Confucius said, "People without faith don't know what they can do. If there is no cart, what can it do? "
0 1 the secret of being kind to others-what is the difference between Zhuangzi and Confucius? Zhuangzi emphasized the relationship between man and nature, and between man and himself, while Confucius suggested that we better adjust our relationship with others. Because if we can cultivate ourselves through harmonious relationship with others, we may get more real happiness in the world.
A professor at Harvard University has been doing research for many years. He found that in today's society, people's sense of happiness and security comes more from their relationship with others. Because we live in a powerful social network era, everyone's inner sense of security, happiness and ability to fall asleep are actually closely related to the harmonious relationship between others.
In the Analects of Confucius, you can also see many secrets of how to get along better with people.
In this article, let's learn this passage together-Confucius said, "people don't believe it, they don't know what they can do." If there is no cart, what can it do? "
I don't know what a person can do without honesty. For example, a big car or a small car, how can we go without bearings between the wheels? (A cart refers to a cart pulled by a cow that can carry heavy objects; A small car refers to a kind of horse-drawn car that carries people. )
This is a clever metaphor. When we walk in the world, we actually go forward step by step by car, follow the torrent of the times and go forward with everyone. Therefore, if a person can't follow the torrent of the whole era and the direction of everyone, generally speaking, he can't go far.
How can I get along well with everyone? The secret lies in one word-"sincerity".
What is a letter? "Words must be kept, and actions must bear fruit." Think and say the same, for the sake of faith; There is a stable and certain value standard in it, which is for faith. Therefore, trust is an extremely important social character.
In the near future, everyone's real wealth may be his credit rating. Some friends will say, "Liang Xiao, I still like listening to you talk about Zhuangzi, because learning from Zhuangzi is not so tiring. When I study the Analects of Confucius, I always feel that I am working hard. Minutes later, I found that it is not right here today and it is not right there tomorrow. In short, this is wrong. "
Yes, we often feel that we will be hurt in the crowd because our study of The Analects of Confucius is not good enough. Unless we can live alone, only with a few friends who are closest to us, know ourselves best and tolerate ourselves best, we will always face the problem of how to get along with others in harmony.
The key to harmony lies in whether you have faith or not. This letter also contains personal credit in the modern sense.
Before, our company did a management due diligence, which involved the personal credit information system. Liang Xiao found that everyone has long been labeled by society: how many times we borrowed money, whether we repaid it on time, whether we had a credit card default record, and whether we had a phone bill record ... all these are counted as the points we have passed in this society.
Liang Xiao even thinks that in the near future, everyone's real wealth is his credit rating. If your credit rating is high, someone will lend you money; You can buy better things at a lower price; You may have a better job ... and a low credit rating, and you will work hard in society.
This is already the case in western developed countries. We often hear people complain: "Drivers in China are on the rampage. Look at the quality of foreign drivers. "
In fact, people are all the same, but foreign countries also count the credit records of driving into the personal credit information system. The cost of running a red light is very large, not just a simple deduction, it may even affect the investors' views on you when you start a business financing one day; It will also affect your mother-in-law's evaluation of you when you get married.
In the era when credit rating is a person's real monetary value, people will increasingly find that honesty is not only a moral issue, but also an economic issue.
Why do you want to study The Analects again now? Because the essence of The Analects is to build a more harmonious social network through personal cultivation. The so-called "self-cultivation, flat world", especially in the era of highly developed Internet, camera and credit information system, in fact, the spirit of The Analects of Confucius can fully reflect the value of people in the Internet age.
In the future, I believe that the rule makers in the whole network era will refer to the standards in The Analects more and more, so each of us should cherish our credit rating, which is the main source of our social money.
For children's education, Liang Xiao thinks this should also be a key link. I remember being beaten several times by my mother when I was a child, all of which were related to my lying. For example, where parents need to sign, imitate the handwriting of parents to sign; At school, I secretly learned to smoke from other children. After being discovered, all the other children confessed. I also made up various stories and reasons to deny smoking. And quietly "borrowing" 50 cents from mom and dad's pocket to buy popsicles has long been discovered (mom and dad are really idle, stuffing some money into their pockets, then deliberately revealing a corner in the changed clothes, secretly observing whether they have taken it, and rushing out to catch it, really can't stand human nature).
In short, the experience of being beaten up for lying as a child left a deep impression on me: it is sad and uneconomical to have no trust and no credit system.
In fact, we deceive ourselves most of the time. The greatest tragedy of many people comes from his lying not only to others, but also to himself. Some people are generally honest with others because they are supervised by others (the force and reaction in the internet age), but they always lie to themselves. The most typical sentence to deceive yourself is: "In fact, I am a freedom-loving person" and "In fact, I am a kind person".
If you really love freedom, why are you kidnapped by various relationships? If you are so kind, why do you have a faint pleasure when you fight mosquitoes? We are often deceived by ourselves, thinking that the other party may still have some attachment to ourselves, thinking that we are still living in love; I feel that I am still working hard, but I am temporarily incompetent ... If we are full of awareness, we will find that we are deceiving ourselves most of the time and are not so honest.
Why should we be aware and alert to this dishonest behavior in real time? Because many people's work hurt him, not because of physical fatigue, but because they didn't accept it; Many people suffer in their feelings, not because two people are poor, but because they don't love each other in their hearts and are forced to keep this state. ...
From keeping faith and honesty with the outside world, this article extends to a very important topic-can we be honest with ourselves besides being sincere with the outside world?
We are also one of the sentient beings. Theoretically, we should be treated equally as ordinary people. It's just that people are generally dishonest to themselves, so that they often ignore this point.
One day, a teacher said, "You should change your' free sleep' into' free sleep (sleep)'. Besides sleeping, you should also be aware of your inner love, hate, greed and jealousy. As long as you are aware of it and see it, you will have a calm mind. "
If a person can regard his body as a car, then his honesty to himself is more in line with what Confucius said-"An unbeliever doesn't know what he can do." What if there is no cart, no cart? "
This is something that each of us needs to be more cautious and take seriously, from trusting others-he believes in himself.
Before going to bed at night, you can ask yourself a question quietly: "What am I dishonest about myself?" If you dare to admit it to yourself, it is also a brave act.
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Now close your eyes and think about it.
What have you done?
Are you dishonest with yourself?
Have the courage to face it now?