There is a person in the world who never says "no". This kind of person is friends with people all over the world except himself, so he has no enemies, but his greatest enemy is himself. Such people will spend all their money quickly, and then find friends, borrow money from friends or make loan guarantees. When he spent the last penny, it was the time when he left this world. And all he left was a completely stupid and ridiculous reputation, although he meant no harm.

This kind of person takes "giving everything to everyone" as his guiding principle in life. But we don't know whether he must share the same fate with others or whether he is afraid of offending others. But what is certain is that he is rarely asked to sign an application, or promise to vote once, or borrow money, or write a check, because in fact he can't do this at all. But he refused to say "no", and people who know him often sarcastically said that he didn't have the courage to say "no".

In another case, a father left a small fortune for his son after his death. As soon as the son inherited the property, those who wanted to take advantage immediately surrounded him. It's time for him to say "no" bravely, but he didn't do it. He has formed the habit of obedience, doesn't like being hated by others, and doesn't have the heart to refuse others' demands. Moreover, he is more soft-hearted to those who insist on hard pulling, and almost completely meets the requirements of those who take a fancy to his wallet. Once he opens his wallet, his friends will keep coming to him. He is a mediator everywhere and a guarantor for everyone. "Please sign this paper for me." Friends often ask him this, and he will only gently ask, "What is this?" Because of his simplicity, he is proud of it! He never refuses anyone's request. Three months later, a long debt bill will fall on this person-this person can't say "no" and is everyone's friend.

Then a malt merchant who took him as the guarantor-met him only once-suddenly stumbled in his business because of his serious speculation in capital and stocks, leading to economic collapse and eventually complete collapse. At this time, this person who can't say "no" is recruited to bear this heavy repayment responsibility. It was a fatal blow to him, and he became poor overnight. But he didn't learn from this incident, and he is still the object of others' help. Every guy in need can get one from him without mercy. He is like a tap that everyone who is thirsty can drink, like bacon that every hungry dog can chew, like a donkey that every rogue can ride if he wants, like a mill that selflessly grinds noodles for everyone except himself. In a word, he is a "good-hearted man" who can't say a word "no" all his life.

If a person wants to live in a calm, smooth and happy environment, then he should bravely say "no" at the right time. Many people lose a lot because they can't say or don't say this "no". It is precisely because we don't have the courage to say "no" that evil runs rampant in the world. We need so much honesty and courage to say such a simple word. People who are on official business dare not say "no" casually, because they may be fired at any time. When a stupid man with a lot of money reaches out his hand to a beautiful woman, it is hard for her to say "no" because her future depends on this "property". An apple polisher won't say this word, because he always smiles and enthusiastically agrees with everything he says to others. When some pleasure temptations appear in front of you, you should have the courage to say "no" immediately. Then when you look back on what happened a little, you will feel how correct your decision is. Human virtue will be more stable with the increase of practice. When indulgence and pleasure tempt you, you should strengthen your faith and say "no" immediately. If you don't do this, but acquiesce or yield, then virtue will be far away from you and your autonomy will be hit hard. It takes some effort to say "no" for the first time, but the more you practice, the less you try. The only way to deal with laziness, self-indulgence, stupidity and bad habits is to say "no" resolutely and decisively. The real virtue lies in saying "no" at the right time.

If a person can't live within his means, he will have nothing and eventually die in debt. After he enters the grave, society will continue to control him. He must be buried according to the requirements of "society" and hold a fashionable funeral. Finally, he must witness the strength of Mrs. Grandi before he can leave. Coffin cloth, rimmed hat, scarf, funeral procession, gold-plated hearse and hired funeral procession were used at the funeral, so all this was just to please Mrs. Ugland. However, the performance of the client's heartbreak, as well as the grief pretended by the hired undertaker and her husband who came for money, are all so worthless and extravagant!

In the wealthy upper class, this useless but expensive funeral farce produces less misfortune than the middle class and the working class. People regard a grand funeral as a "status symbol". Middle-class people strive to enter the upper class, join the ranks of the rich, and will be buried by the funeral procession and their husbands after their death. Like those with "higher status", they eventually became victims of the undertaker. This makes others follow this trend even more. "We do what others do." Most people are willing to spend the money. They let their friends, servants or themselves mourn, so that the funeral is decent.

For an unbearable family, this luxury burden is really too heavy. If the person in charge of the main source of family income dies, the undertaker will be responsible for everything left behind. How can a grieving widow, or an orphan who has lost the care of her parents, bargain with a businessman about mourning, black gloves and the sad "shroud"? Because every penny is closely related to their later life. But at this special moment, they must spend the little cash they have saved on this vulgar, wasteful and hypocritical funeral. Is it better to spend money on the dead than on the living? A bad habit, no matter which class of society, has room for survival, even those who live in poverty. In proportion to the income level, the working class and the middle class suffered the same losses. In England, a businessman's funeral costs about 50 pounds on average, while a laborer who sells his physical strength only needs 5 to 10 pounds. But in Scotland, funeral expenses are relatively small. The working class is very willing to hold a decent funeral for those relatives who leave them forever, because it can bring them glory. They don't want to spend money on other things, but they are willing to spend money on this. Most workers' clubs are essentially funeral clubs. Generally speaking, the husband's funeral costs 10, and the wife's funeral costs 5. However, sometimes the funeral expenses of a mechanic can be as high as 15, 20, 30 or even 40 pounds, because he is a member of several funeral clubs at the same time. In this case, undertaker should receive and "arrange" the members or chairmen of these clubs to attend the funeral. It is unexpected to insure several children in funeral clubs at the same time, but it is true. Just like we heard that a person bought life insurance for no less than 19 different funeral clubs in Manchester!

When a family member who does not belong to any funeral club dies, the funeral of the deceased will still be held by these clubs. However, the family members of the deceased must pay heavy taxes to the club as the use fee of manpower and material resources, so that the club can complete a respectable funeral for the wife or children of the deceased. If the deceased is the head of the family-the father, the situation may be even worse, because his life savings are likely to be spent by his wife or children during the mourning period. After death, it is not only the destruction of life, but also an unreasonable bad habit to spend all the savings at home in order to hold a decent funeral.

Is it true that only those dresses with certain colors are undertaker? Don't we just express our condolences through inner sadness and false appearance? When talking about early Christians, Bingham said: "They neither condemned nor approved of this funeral habit, but regarded it as a trivial matter, leaving people some freedom to take any way. What is commendable is that those who completely ignore it or put it aside easily have the courage and thought of Christians. "

John wesley wrote in his suicide note: After my death, each of the six poor people who carried me to the grave will get 20 shillings. "Because," he explained, "I especially hope that there will be no hearse, no funeral procession, no coffin cloth, not to mention the tragic scene. I just want to love the tears of my people and let them accompany me back to the embrace of God. In the name of God, I solemnly implore my funeral executor to follow my decision and fulfill my last wish. "

This custom has been deeply rooted in our life, especially in our time, and it is very difficult to change it. But we are still eager to change it, but we usually encounter several questions, such as: "How will others react?" "What kind of fluctuations will society have?" When faced with such problems, we will shrink back reluctantly and become cowards like those who only have Nuo Nuo. However, through repeated publicity, it will also have a certain impact on people and leave a deep impression on them. With the development of the times, this social fashion will eventually change. Just like Queen Adelaide, on her deathbed, she asked the undertaker to be excused from the funeral procession. Sir Robert Peel also abandoned this extravagant habit and asked the undertaker not to hold large-scale or luxurious funerals; What they do should be said to have a corresponding impact on social fashion, and those who are used to imitating their middle class also benefit from it. At the same time, I believe that someone can curb the growth of this meaningless funeral. As long as we persistently publicize new ideas and improve our ability to understand and solve problems, we can carry out substantive and effective reforms in this direction.

In the United States, some social organizations have been established, whose members do not hold funerals and urge others not to hold funerals. Perhaps, only by relying on the joint efforts of all people can we achieve the goal of reforming funeral ceremonies, because no matter where we are, the strength of individuals is basically very small, and we are unable to resist the deep-rooted prejudice in the hearts of the public.