Wechat official account, I love to get to the bottom of it:

First, I don't know if you are a student or an office worker.

If it is a student family, interpersonal relationship is not the first priority. As long as you study hard, you will be the first choice to go to a good university in the future, learn your major well and lay a good foundation for employment. Interpersonal relationship, in the past student days, with everyone's employment, the market will gradually change.

If you are an office worker, it is also divided into three aspects:

1. If you are a fresh meat in the workplace, learning skills from competent people is a priority. "Strike while the iron is hot" is a well-known truth. As for your boss's bad temper, you can ignore it.

I remember that at the end of June 2002, I graduated from 5438+ 10 for half a year and entered a watch company in Guangzhou to do finance, and I first came into contact with industrial accounting. My major is investment economy, which is a marginal major of finance. I choose to do finance, there are some unknowns and many unknowns.

My partner is Sister Yu, in her forties, from Nanchang, Jiangxi. At that time, her husband was admitted to a graduate student of anesthesiology in a military medical college in Guangzhou. She left her job in Nanchang without pay and went to Guangzhou to work with her husband for graduate school. Yu Dajie is experienced in accounting, but her temper is like firecrackers, which may explode at any time. When you are unhappy, scold the boss. I went out with her to file tax returns for the company, and she was unhappy and scolded the tax officials. Therefore, her violent temper is notoriously bad for taxpayers in charge of the local taxation bureau. But the boss just likes her. She works efficiently, goes out neatly and is lazy, and pushes all the work she doesn't have to do to me.

Once upon a time, I also silently scolded her in my heart, but scolding her and complaining didn't help and couldn't change any situation. I am a pragmatic person, digging business bit by bit. I didn't understand it at first, so I asked Sister Yu. When Yu Dajie is happy, explain it to me loudly and quickly. When I am unhappy, what awaits me is a scolding.

In this environment, I choose to be silent, practice at any time, and often work overtime until 10: 30 in the evening. Finally, after half a year, my business is becoming more and more skilled, overtime hours are gradually decreasing, and Yu Dajie is getting better and better to me. Because: at her instigation, I finished checking all my homework, and she can hand it in as soon as she summarizes it. I am glad that I have made rapid progress and finally live in the sight of my boss.

I wanted to face my sister from the beginning. What will happen if I choose to play hardball? I'm not skilled in business, so I'm not as valuable to the company as my sister, and I'm sure I'll be sacrificed as a result. Being invincible in the workplace lies in your precious and relatively irreplaceable value! So impulsive and straightforward ... like five familiar words after 90-that's nothing! The key is whether you are irreplaceable. The essence of the workplace is to create value. If you understand this, you won't be upset.

2. If you are an ordinary employee.

? After hard work, you have two years of work experience. In the face of the workplace, the key is to hide yourself in time so that others can't see through it at a glance. It is best to "dress up as a pig and eat a tiger" to confuse each other. In my spare time, I will learn more professional skills and related skills, and plan to obtain relevant professional titles to show myself on appropriate occasions. Hide when you should, and avoid colleagues stumbling behind you and hindering your development because of jealousy and imbalance. Anyone who slanders you is because you are better than him in some way. No one will denigrate the weak who can do nothing. Get the title, first report to the unit to see if there is any possibility of development. If so, continue due diligence; If not, pay attention to relevant reliable information. If appropriate, change platforms and companies in order to gain a new atmosphere.

My friend Xiaoya, a native of Chongqing, Sichuan, found her career bottleneck after working for two years. There is no vitality in the workplace, but it is accompanied by intrigue among colleagues. Besides work, Xiaoya has to say hello to his colleagues. Besides eating and sleeping, she spends all her spare time studying and attending training, day after day, year after year. Finally, four and a half years later, Xiaoya won the title of certified public accountant and auditor. As a result, Xiaoya successfully moved to Dahua Company, a fortune 500 company, as the financial manager.

3. if you reach the middle and high level.

Xiaohui is a native of Wuhan, Hubei Province, and graduated from Wuhan University with a major in finance and economics. I met her in 2006 because she is a classmate's girlfriend. At this time, Xiaohui has just graduated for five years. Through her excellent professional skills and her own shrewdness, Xiaohui has reached the level of financial manager. However, due to the change of the company, Xiaohui feels that the current company is not suitable for her. So Xiaohui listened to Xiao Hao's suggestion and made two preparations: on the one hand, she found a professional headhunter at the right time and sought new job opportunities; On the other hand, I joined the relevant salon circle, re-entered the school to study EMBA, and expanded my circle of friends. Finally, eight months later, Xiaohui successfully found her favorite company, favorite position and favorite salary.

The job-hopping path of middle and high-level employees is naturally different from that of grassroots employees. Job-hopping at middle and high levels is related to senior headhunters and various circles. Have you found that in order to enter a new circle, some people go to EMBA, and some people go to various annual meetings ... At this time, everyone is concerned about how to increase their leadership and personality charm.

4. From the development of the above three categories, we can see that:

A. every stratum has contradictions.

The B * * * of each class is that they try their best to achieve upward transfer through their own efforts.

C. the difference is that each level has different implementation methods. Grassroots people change the status quo through website job hunting, while middle and high-level people change the status quo through circles and headhunters.

Second, I don't know if you are a man or a woman. I try to give general advice.

Although personal values occupy the mainstream position in the workplace, they need to have certain interpersonal skills.

Interpersonal psychology tells us that people's communication methods include language communication, expression communication and physical communication; People's postures include subordinate posture, expression posture, imitation posture and professional posture.

Generally speaking, the communication mode and posture in communication mode are relatively easy to learn and use.

As we all know, in the effect of communication, 7% comes from language communication, 40% comes from expression and tone communication, and more than 50% comes from silent physical communication.

Therefore, in the communication with colleagues, we might as well use the tone of colleagues' language to express, and at the same time use our favorite body language to create an atmosphere in which everyone is on the same frequency. For example, colleague A likes to cross his legs and make harmless remarks. You can also try to do this. The same action will create a harmonious phenomenon. Generally speaking, people believe in body language more, because body is more difficult to control than language. However, if the behavior of colleagues is vulgar, that is another matter.

We know that subordinate posture, performance posture and imitation posture are personal postures, and professional postures are professional postures used by traffic police or other relevant personnel. For example, colleague B is used to talking to you in this subordinate posture, with his hands on his cheeks. You can also try to talk to him in this posture. For example, colleague C likes to communicate with you by making faces, and you can also try to respond to him in this way. ……

You can practice these postures if you want.

But the principle of interpersonal communication is: if you make yourself comfortable, you will be lonely; Just want to make others comfortable, you will eventually be exhausted; If both sides are uncomfortable, it will spread to people who are more uncomfortable; Only when both sides are comfortable, have a balance point, mutual rights and obligations, is a better interpersonal model. Therefore, what kind of interpersonal relationship model to adopt is not only for yourself, but also for each other.

Text: Wang Yueying