Miss Yang: Hello! I have been insomnia for nearly a year, and I can't sleep almost every night. At first, it was caused by work pressure. Now I feel more and more serious. I worry about this and that every day. I am very scared and nervous, which makes my back hurt. Now my heart and chest hurt. I don't know what to do. I used to worry about the company's affairs, fearing that the company's tax refund could not be refunded, and the tax would come to audit the accounts. Now I worry about these things all the time. First, I'm afraid of car accidents (sometimes I'm afraid of my family, sometimes I'm afraid of others' car accidents); Second, I'm afraid that other people's companies will close down because of tax audit and other reasons. I'm afraid that they can't bear anything. I don't know why I'm always worried about others. What's going on? It's painful to spend every day in worry. Please ask Teacher Yang to help me, thank you very much! Wish: All is well! This friend: Hello! I am very willing to discuss the problems you are facing with you. You said, "I have been insomnia for nearly a year, and I can't sleep almost every night. At first, it was caused by work pressure. ..... I was worried about the company's business before, fearing that the company's tax refund could not be refunded, and the tax would come to audit the accounts. " The cause of these problems is probably that your company is doing illegal business. Of course, it does not rule out the possibility that you will be frustrated as a financial director, but the cause of your problems is your introverted, timid, overly cautious, thoughtful, inactive and indecisive personality. You said, "Now I am worried about these things all the time. First, I am afraid of car accidents (sometimes I am afraid of my family, sometimes I am afraid of others' car accidents); Second, I am afraid that other people's companies will go bankrupt because of tax audits and other reasons. I am afraid that they can't bear anything. I don't know how to always worry about others ... It is very painful to spend every day worrying. " This is a manifestation of your insecurity, uncertainty or imperfection, entanglement in details, and a strong fear of criticism, mistakes, excessive self-concern and self-restraint when dealing with things. To change your problems, we must first know that your problems are related to past misfortunes and psychological trauma, and calmly analyze my personality characteristics and causes, such as "worrying about this and that every day", what events made you "almost unable to sleep every night" more than a year ago, and what do you mean by "stress"? And so on, if you can find out the reason, then vent your inner pain, fear and nervousness, so as to reduce your fear and relieve your nervousness. Secondly, we should establish confidence in winning, try our best to overcome psychological incentives, and overcome unnatural behaviors and thinking with strong willpower. For example, car accidents are accidental factors, and we should treat them with a mentality of "being a blessing is not a curse, but a curse cannot be avoided"; The company can't refund the tax refund, and there is a problem with the tax audit. This is because others are doing illegal business. Even if there is a problem, I have nothing to do with it. If the company closes down, I will leave. I have done my duty as the chief financial officer, so I don't need to think about other things in the company. Besides, your consideration is also alarmist. This requires you to sum up successful experiences step by step and persevere, so that these inexplicable fears can be eliminated. Third, take the initiative to communicate with others, take part in collective recreational and sports activities, do more things that interest you, cultivate hobbies in life, and let pleasure and happiness replace fear and sorrow. Fourth, make some adjustments to your own personality and life: ① cognitive adjustment. The essence of your problem is "the feeling of insecurity, uncertainty or imperfection, entanglement in details, and a very strong fear of criticism, fear of making mistakes, excessive self-concern and self-restraint". The key to regulation is to have a correct understanding of your own problems and overcome your fear with your own will. ② Think from another angle. Your problem is only a superficial phenomenon. What really works is your bad personality and way of thinking. Therefore, we should consciously strive to overcome the sensitive, impatient, aggressive and other personalities, change the overly rigid and serious way of doing things, don't be too stubborn, think from another angle, and things will often take an unexpected turn for the better. At the same time, build up confidence and face setbacks bravely and optimistically. ③ Don't be a perfectionist. There are no perfect people and things in the world. As long as you work hard, it is the best for yourself. We should admit and accept the possibility of making mistakes, and should not be too harsh on life and study. Pursuing extreme perfection can only be counterproductive. At the same time, we should not be too absolute when looking at problems, but learn to compare relatively and keep an optimistic attitude. 4 divert attention. When thinking repeatedly about car accidents and tax refund, the mind will focus on one point. At this time, the most important thing is to find ways to divert attention, get rid of the real symptoms and get rid of the pain as soon as possible. For example, if you immediately go to do something you are interested in or listen to music, then you may forget the "worry" you associate with it. ⑤ Adjust the living conditions. Actively participate in various cultural and sports activities, so that boring daily life becomes rich and colorful; Before going to sleep every night, you can take a deep breath to relax your mood. While slowly inhaling and exhaling, you can count the number of times in your mind, that is, "counting your breath", so that you can get rid of other thoughts and be calm and achieve the purpose of relaxation. ⑥ Take a natural attitude. When your fears and worries appear, you can't be nervous, you can't force them to disappear, but accept them frankly and say to yourself with a relaxed attitude, "Think about it, it's no big deal!" That is to say, we should treat it with a normal heart, don't treat it as a big deal, just like the change of the weather-conform to nature, do what we should do (eat when we should eat, sleep when we should sleep, and have fun when we should play), and insist on doing what we should and can do well. Slowly, your mood will relax, and you will pay less attention to the emergence of fear and worry. Over time, when you really relax, this symptom will gradually disappear. Fifth, look on the bright side as much as possible and look at the positive side. It is important to cultivate your own abilities in all aspects, because only when you have the ability can you have confidence and challenge yourself to success. Sixth, adjust the living conditions. Actively participate in various cultural and sports activities, so that boring daily life becomes rich and colorful; When you are afraid and worried, you can take a deep breath to relax (breathe in long and slowly. You can imagine your lungs as a balloon, and you want to fill the balloon as much as possible. When you feel that the balloon has completely inflated, it means that it has sunk into the abdomen and kept it for two seconds. Then, gently and slowly exhale. Inhale for four seconds and exhale for four seconds. You can breathe for a few seconds. In order to slow down the speed, you can make some changes in the method of counting seconds, changing "one second" into "one thousandth", which can basically reduce the speed to a number of about one second. When you start inhaling, your mind starts counting: "one thousandth, two thousandths, three thousandths, four thousandths". You must keep inhaling until you count "four thousandths" and then exhale in the same way. ), or imagine relaxation (imagine relaxation method is to achieve the purpose of physical and mental relaxation through the imagination of some peaceful, soothing and pleasant scenes. You should try your best to use all kinds of senses to see its shape, hear its sound, smell its taste and touch its softness ... just like being in person. For example, you can imagine walking on the endless prairie. On a late spring afternoon, when the sun sets, the afterglow sets each other off. When you step on the soft grass, the fresh smell of weeds, flowers and countryside bursts into the nose, and birds are singing and butterflies are flying from time to time. You are there, and the breeze caresses your face, just like my mother's gentle touch when I was a child; Bathing in soft light is like parents' exhortation when they are away from home; The high sky and the distant mountains make you feel relaxed and happy. At this time, you stretch your whole body and take a deep breath slowly, feeling extremely relaxed and comfortable. ）。 In this way, you can get rid of other thoughts, be calm and achieve the purpose of relaxation. The above are just some of my analysis and suggestions. I believe it will definitely help to alleviate or eliminate your symptoms. Your friend Yang Yonglong wishes you to get out of the predicament as soon as possible and integrate into your life healthily and happily! Miss Yang: Hello! I am very glad to receive your reply, and thank you very much for helping me answer my questions in your busy schedule. My recent situation is getting worse and worse. I am still in a state of nervousness and fear every day, and my body is also unwell. My back has been painful, my chest is stuffy and painful, and my heart is also painful. I am afraid that I will get some diseases or something, and I don't know how long I will live. The main reason why I couldn't sleep a year ago was that a customs declaration was delayed and the time was coming. I was afraid that I couldn't get a tax refund, so I couldn't sleep. There seems to be no other reason. When I was a child, I felt that I had not been hit. However, my personality is introverted, my communication skills are not good, and I am very serious and responsible for my work. I've been worried about other things recently, fearing that those buildings, buildings and bridges will collapse because of cutting corners and other reasons. I feel that the sky is falling, and I have been thinking about these things at night, making me unable to sleep all night. I don't concentrate at work, and I've been thinking about it. I'm very nervous and afraid, and I don't know what to do. Please ask Mr. Yang to help me again. So that I can stop worrying about anything, thank you very much. Look forward to hearing from you! Wish: All is well! This friend: Hello! I think you may be introverted, sensitive, face-saving, cautious, and always want to be perfect and can't tolerate small mistakes. Once you have small mistakes or psychological fluctuations (bad feelings) in your life, you will be associated and even unable to resist this feeling. Therefore, in daily life and work, we must keep in mind the following points to make ourselves develop in a perfect direction: ① Emphasize positive views and reduce negative views. There is the greatest potential for success, but don't let you be your worst enemy. If the perfect person didn't spend so much time on planning, he wouldn't force us to act unprepared and spend time to remedy it afterwards. Things are not perfect, so relax. Therefore, we should consciously strive to overcome the sensitive, impatient, aggressive and other personalities, change the overly rigid and serious way of doing things, don't be too obsessed with death, think from another angle, and things will often take an unexpected turn. At the same time, build up confidence and face setbacks bravely and optimistically. Secondly, don't be a perfectionist. There are no perfect people and things in the world. As long as you work hard, it is the best for yourself. We should admit and accept the possibility of making mistakes, and should not be too harsh on life and study. Pursuing extreme perfection can only be counterproductive. At the same time, we should not be too absolute when looking at problems, but learn to compare relatively and keep an optimistic attitude. Third, you should take some time out to communicate with your peers every day, or watch TV, play games, participate in sports activities, etc., which can relieve stress, and at the same time, you should take a proper rest to ensure a good attitude. Fourth, we should shift the excitement. When thinking repeatedly about "those buildings, buildings and bridges will collapse because of cutting corners and other reasons", the most important thing is to find ways to divert attention and get rid of the entanglement of realistic thinking as soon as possible. For example, once the environment is changed, the brain will increase its vitality driven by freshness. If it is supplemented by activities such as pastoral landscapes, fun entertainment games and humorous jokes, it will have a better effect on relieving tension and stress. Or go to do something you are interested in or listen to music at once. At this time, all your attention is focused on something you are interested in or music, and you may forget the associated "worry ...". Fifth, about "discomfort, back pain all the time, chest tightness and pain, heart pain, fear of what disease I will suffer, I don't know how long I will live ... I have been thinking about these things at night, so I can't sleep all night." It is suggested that you take leg melanin, or melatonin, or Baiyoujie, orororyzanol+Valium tablets (two tablets of oryzanol and one tablet of Valium, taken three times a day), or vitamin E (one tablet)+oryzanol (two tablets) for a period of time, which has a miraculous effect on improving sleep quality. Sixth, what can be done at the worst, that is, no tax refund, company closure, collapse of buildings, buildings and bridges? If "life" should not be exhausted, I will still live well; If I die, I can't stop it. Seventh, we should treat the situation we face with a normal heart, let nature take its course, don't think too much about the situation we face, and try our best to talk about the situation with our companions, friends and family, so that we can share and resolve it. Eighth, insist on taking part in physical exercise every day. Physical exercise can make the brain's excitement and inhibition process alternate reasonably, and avoid the nervous system from being excessively nervous. The exercise items can be selected according to one's own hobbies and local conditions, such as various ball games, running and exercises. Exercise should be moderate, not high-intensity activities, and avoid overwork. These are just my personal opinions. Please refer to them. Your friend Yang Yonglong wishes you to get out of the stressful situation as soon as possible and bathe in the atmosphere of happiness, joy, joy and love every day! Miss Yang: Hello! The Mid-Autumn Festival is coming. First of all, I wish you and your family a happy holiday! This is the third time I have written to you. I wonder if you still remember it. Thank you very much for your help in the first two times. I'm still full of houses and high-rise buildings that suddenly collapse because of cutting corners. I'm very nervous and afraid. My chest and heart have been hurting all the time, and I almost have no sleep all night, but I just can't relieve it. I don't know if it's because I'm too afraid of death. I also went to see a psychologist. The psychologist said that I was probably caused by insecurity, but I couldn't find the reason. I didn't know what to do. I remember that at first, I was stressed by work, which caused insomnia. Later, I went to see a doctor. The doctor told me that I was suffering from depression. Later, I went to look for information about depression. The more I read it, the more scared I became. Later, my illness became more and more serious. I don't know if it will be related to this reason. I read the information about depression on the Internet, saying that it takes a long time to take medicine, and I'm afraid that I'm going to get married now, fearing that taking medicine will have an impact on my future pregnancy. Sometimes I feel so sorry for my family that I always worry about them. Sometimes I feel that I don't want to live, and I feel that it is too painful to live like this. I envy seeing other people's happy lives every day. If only I could get healthy! Teacher Yang, is there a way that can be cured without taking medicine or taking traditional Chinese medicine? And how can I live a happy and carefree life every day? Look forward to hearing from you! Wish: All is well! This friend: Hello! As for the reason why you "have a house all day long, and high-rise buildings suddenly collapse because of cutting corners, you are very nervous and afraid, and your chest and heart have been hurting all the time. Almost all of them have been sleepless all night, but they can't be relieved", I quite agree with the psychologist's statement-it may be caused by insecurity. On the surface, the cause of your problem is that you are under great work pressure and worried about your own accounting (if you exclude the reason of illegal accounting), then the deeper reason is likely to be that you are at the age of 3-6, or isolated from your parents and fostered in other people's homes; Or be intimidated by others; Or suffered an accidental injury; Or saw the scene of trees falling, houses collapsing, etc., in view of this situation, it is necessary to recall and analyze under the guidance of psychologists, so that the insecurity accumulated in the subconscious can be completely resolved. As for whether your problem is depression, I can't tell from your letter, but I can introduce the situation of depression in detail: depression is a negative emotional response. Its outstanding characteristics are pessimistic mood, indifferent attitude, bad feeling of itself and self-blame. Sometimes it is manifested as insomnia, loss of appetite, weight loss, decreased sexual desire and other symptoms. Some people even can't stand the depression, have no interest in everything, have no hope, can't do anything, lose self-esteem and self-confidence, feel meaningless pain in life and have suicidal desires and behaviors. The basic mood of depression is depression, as well as lack of interest, hopelessness, helplessness, powerlessness, loss of self-esteem and self-confidence, and feeling that life is meaningless. All these symptoms are decline, decline, absence or loss, so people often use the sense of loss to summarize. People who are prone to depression are mainly people who lack interpersonal communication, have troubles and pains in their hearts and are unwilling to tell others, and are introverted and pessimistic. Its judgment criteria are: ① losing interest in daily activities and having no sense of pleasure; (2) energy is obviously decreased, and there is no reason for continuous fatigue; ③ Mental motor retardation or agitation; (4) have remorse, or guilt; ⑤ Lenovo is difficult, or the ability of conscious thinking is significantly reduced; 6. Low self-evaluation, repeated thoughts of wanting to die, or suicidal behavior; 7 insomnia, or waking up early, or sleeping too much; 8 loss of appetite, or obvious weight loss, etc. If there are five symptoms in the above depression and it lasts for more than three weeks, we should be alert and make conscious adjustments or ask others for counseling; If there are five symptoms in the above depression and it lasts for more than three months, then we can basically conclude that we have depression. Besides, I said that your problem is not necessarily depression, even depression is not terrible. What is terrible is that some people treat depression as cancer. After our research on cancer patients, we think that cancer cells exist in all of us, but these cells are controlled by the "electromagnetic gate" in our brain, so that it has no chance of growth, development and reproduction. Once we hear that we have cancer and are depressed and highly nervous and afraid, it will affect the brain's "electromagnetic" By the same token, each of us has a factor of depression above our psychology. Under normal circumstances, it is controlled by our consciousness and subconscious mind. When we think that depression is an incurable "cancer", it will cause high tension, fear and depression, resulting in a vicious circle. Hehe, I want to tell you here that depression is not terrible, of course, it can also be cured! At the same time, I suggest you go and see "Can depression heal itself without treatment?" 》。 Hehe, there is an eight-year-old depressed patient. After half a year's counseling, I didn't take any medicine for half a year, and now she has got out of depression. It has been more than five months now, and her condition is very good. Two days ago, she wrote to me to report her peace! To make it clear, depression is actually due to setbacks, irreconcilable inner contradictions, being too brave (doing things beyond one's ability, not admitting defeat after being frustrated, but being seriously frustrated psychologically), paying too much attention to oneself (thinking that one is a saint, omnipotent and omnipotent, and can't calm down when making mistakes), and suppressing one's emotions too much (for example, a man doesn't flick when he has tears, etc.). Hehe, as long as we know ourselves correctly, treat ourselves well, know our emotions correctly and treat them well, then depression will disappear from us. As for whether to take medicine or not, judging from your situation, I think as long as you can improve your sleep, take some drugs that are harmless to your health and can improve your sleep, as I said in my last letter, such as leg melanin, melatonin, oryzanol+Valium tablets (two tablets of oryzanol and one tablet of Valium, taken three times a day) and vitamin E (one tablet)+oryzanol (two tablets). In addition, you said, "The doctor said that I was suffering from depression. Later, I went to find information about depression. The more I read it, the more scared I became. Later, my condition became more and more serious. I wonder if it will be related to this reason." In fact, if you ask me, your problem has nothing to do with depression. The serious reason is that you have received bad psychological hints. In order to reduce your psychological susceptibility to suggestion, first of all, don't listen to the wind as rain, but try to shield your irrational side. You'd better judge what you encounter with your ears and undisturbed mind. When judging, your body and mind should be in a relatively relaxed state. Don't judge yourself or things when there are some symptoms, anxiety, depression, worry and other stress and fatigue. At the same time, you should keep an open and accommodating mind, and don't be judged. Finally, I want to say that people live not for life and spirit, nor for career or so-called task or mission, but to experience the happiness, joy, joy and love of the most solemn, greatest and glorious being, so happiness, joy, joy and love are the most important for each of us. So how can we do this? First of all, you should understand that there is only one purpose in life, and that is to let you experience the most complete glory. To experience the most perfect glory, we must grasp the moment of your own mind. Many people feel that they are living in a sea of troubles, in fact, they are boring to recall the past and look forward to the future pessimistically, while abandoning the moment that is very important to them. The idiom "Be happy without thinking about Shu" originally meant that Liu Chan was content with pleasure without thinking about national subjugation. If it is applied to psychological adjustment, it has a positive significance of mastering and enjoying this moment. It is important for us living people to have this moment. Grasping this moment, the past has become history. It can't control us, the future is still on the way, and it can't be left to us. Then it is only this moment that determines us, so it is very important to do well what we should do at this moment. When our ancestors first created the word "human", they wrote it according to human appearance. People with heads on them were represented by "mouth", shoulders and bodies were represented by "big", and legs were represented by two vertical lines. When the word "human" was first used, it was a "mouth" and a "big" on the word "big". Later, in practice, we found that some people think too much, which hinders our energy and attention in pursuing the main goal, so we removed our heads from thinking about the messy things of the past and the future, and the word "person" became the word "big". In practice, people find that because we have too many desires, in order to satisfy these desires, we have to shoulder a lot of things. If we live too tired, it will still hinder our energy and attention in pursuing our main goals. At this time, we will take off our shoulders, and then the word "person" will become two vertical lines below the word "person"; After people become like this, they are still tired because of wandering around, which still hinders our energy and attention in pursuing our main goals. At this time, we have to remove our legs, which has become our current word "people". From the change of the word "human", we can find that the essence of life lies in the pursuit of happiness, pleasure and happiness, and the way to happiness, pleasure and happiness lies in unloading those unnecessary physical and mental burdens. Hehe, as long as you really put it down or unload it, then everything will be all right for you; As long as everything goes well with you, there will be "bread, milk and of course butter", hehe, that is to say, happiness, joy and happiness will come to you as scheduled! Miss Yang: Hello! I was glad to hear from you last week. In your letter, you mentioned that there was a patient with depression who cured herself without taking medicine. I really want to know how she came this way, and I really want to get rid of the predicament and live a happy and healthy life as soon as possible. I recalled what happened when I was a child, and found that there were no such conditions as those mentioned in your last letter. The psychologist said that I had anxiety, and she said that it might be caused by my lack of self-confidence, but I just couldn't adjust well. I am still worried about the collapse of the house every day, afraid of death. I always think that all houses will collapse, and it is useless to find various reasons to refute them. I have been in a state of tension and terror, and all parts of my body are painful (heart, chest and back), uncomfortable, and I am in pain every day, but I can't help it, and sometimes I want to die. I still can't sleep at night. It's no use taking some Chinese medicine. I keep thinking about the collapse of my house. I'm very worried and scared. By the way, can we young people take the melatonin you mentioned last time? I'm only 27 years old. Can I? Maybe it's anxiety and other reasons. Now I'm suffering from gynecological diseases, and I'm worried. Sometimes I think my life is too bitter. I really want to go back to the carefree life when I was a child. If only I could be physically and mentally healthy. I really want to adjust my mentality and live a healthy and happy life, but I can't always do it. I also tried to do exercise, but it didn't work. I don't know what to do. Look forward to hearing from you! Wish: Happy National Day and good health! This friend: Hello! In your letter, you mentioned that you really want to know the situation of the depressed patient I counseled. In fact, the main process of getting out of depression is to keep adjusting step by step according to the methods I provided, and at the same time, keep reading the book "Reconstruction of Life" and constantly transform yourself according to the methods provided in it, so she got out of depression. Hehe, she wrote to me yesterday and said, "I feel that life is a little easier now." Put forward the following opinions and suggestions for your reference: First of all, it can be seen from your letter that you have clearly realized the inadvisability of "worrying about the collapse of the house", so what we need to do next is to make it clear that "the collapse of the house and the car accident" are only accidental events, so we should treat them with a kind of psychology of "it is a blessing, not a curse, but a curse that cannot be avoided", that is, with a kind of indifference, association and persistence. Secondly, you should understand that "life is a process of constant injury and constant self-repair." It is also a process of improving psychological adaptability and maturing in the process of constant injury and self-repair. A philosopher once said: "The greatness of man lies in that he can laugh at life and life after the most cruel blow!" In the course of life, it is intertwined with contradictions and pains, full of pursuits and hardships, and full of thorns and bumps. Life is a halo of hardships, hardships, hardships and setbacks. Every time we overcome difficulties, hardships and setbacks, we will add a bright pearl to our life, and our life will also add a lot of color. Therefore, I don't know how many hardships and setbacks I have to experience in the journey of life. Only when I have experienced difficulties and obstacles can I more appreciate the beauty of life and the beauty of life. Thirdly, in Bo Bai Xue, Dong Lingzi pointed out that there is something in the world that is easy to get and easy to lose, which is emotion. For example, happiness, if you feel happy, you will be happy; You feel pain, you feel pain. The corresponding emotions such as sadness and happiness, tension and relaxation, love and hate, happiness and depression can still be "distributed according to needs", and you can have as much as you want. You lose your sadness, that is, you gain happiness; Lose tension, that is, get relaxed; To lose hate is to gain love; ……。 Above the psychological emotion, Lu Xiangshan's famous sentence "My heart is the universe, and the universe is my heart" is proof. What is the meaning of this passage? In a word, "Happiness comes from thought". Although the sentence "Happiness comes from thoughts" is simple, it can really make us what we want. Fourth, we should look at the bright and positive side of everything, enjoy ourselves, appreciate ourselves, and always adhere to Li Bai's creed of "I am born to be useful", foster strengths and avoid weaknesses, create happiness and enjoy happiness. Fifth, face up to reality, look at society correctly, look at life, look at one's own situation, be psychologically prepared to deal with setbacks, and accept appropriate experience of setbacks, that is, properly "see the world through the storm". Some people say that life is like a problem basket. The problems here have just been fixed, and the problems there have leaked out. Life is endless, and there are many problems. Life is a process of constantly appearing and constantly solving problems, just like an equation without knowing the answer. Although we don't know whether there is a solution to this equation, we don't know how many solutions there are, and we don't know which solution is the best, but we follow the advantages and avoid disadvantages, so that our hearts are full of happiness, joy, happiness and love. Therefore, we should know the surrounding environment we are facing, and adjust ourselves to adapt to the environment as much as possible. Sixth, we should know ourselves, face ourselves squarely, find out our own shortcomings and deficiencies, and treat others correctly. When we encounter difficulties and setbacks in our study and life, we should think more in our hearts, why this happened, what caused it, and what methods you can use to solve it. It is useless to realize depression and pessimism, but we should cheer up, solve what can be solved, and try our best to forget what cannot be solved. Seventh, we should be optimistic about life, face people and things every day with a smile, be broad-minded, enrich our knowledge, make more friends and get out of our fiefs; Speak freely, express your troubles and feelings, don't ask too much of yourself, be realistic; Believe and use your own ability to believe that you can control your life, change your life, and control your own destiny. Believe that you can control yourself, transform yourself, and master your own development path. Eighth, when you are "worried and scared about the collapse of the house", you can ask yourself the following three questions: ① What bothers me? This question can help you to judge the seriousness of the problem you are facing. Is it something that is happening at present? Or is it something that has happened or that you are afraid will happen? On the one hand, it can make you narrow the scope of distress and pain, on the other hand, it can make you find that the situation you are in at this moment is not bad. What makes you really feel distressed and painful is the direction of your inner thinking, that is, the past and the future are what you really think about. This will help you turn your mind back to this moment and really put your mind into happiness, joy and enjoyment at this moment. ② Ask yourself, "Why do I hold on to this negative feeling and not let it go?" This will make us look at the problem from a different angle. In fact, the irritability, pain and fear of our mentality are still happiness, pleasure and happiness. To put it bluntly, it is a matter of choice. At this time, you will find yourself looking at things with a negative attitude, indulging yourself in depression and pain, and treating yourself as a suffering person. That is to say, you are very willing to enjoy a life of irritability, depression, pain and fear, rather than a life of happiness, pleasure and happiness. If you are willing to enjoy a happy, cheerful and happy life, then you will abandon the feelings of irritability, depression, pain and fear, and of course, a happy, cheerful and happy life will follow your changed mentality. You have to ask yourself, "What do I really want?" I think this problem is obvious to you. Each of us yearns for a life full of happiness, joy, joy and love, and is also very willing to pursue this life of happiness, joy, joy and love at any cost. At this time, you will consciously adjust your mentality and let yourself grasp the happiness, joy, joy and love you have at this moment. Of course, your mentality will also lead you to a life full of happiness, joy, joy and love. Ninth, I suggest you do sports, preferably after work at noon and afternoon every day.