People in the city want to come out, people outside the city want to go in, people's hearts are always changing, love is easy to get along with, marriage is like a book, and young people like beautiful covers and gorgeous rhetoric; When people reach middle age, they like the smoothness and connotation in the book; I may also want to write a book in my old age-if life could be repeated, would you still choose this bedside person to accompany me? Do you still want to go the way you used to? Will you still like the choice and disregard when you were young?
Marriage is half rational and half impulsive. Among them, there are too many uncertainties, especially under the pressure of marriage, happiness is really difficult.
On the one hand, it is a high bride price, on the other hand, it can't be taken out. If both sides don't compromise, marriage will have a yellow rhythm.
Although everyone knows that Jiangxi bride price is very expensive, it still varies from place to place. The bride price in the title is 480 thousand, which is obviously in accordance with local customs. The other party may think that this is normal operation.
But for a person who just joined the work, 480,000 yuan is almost a fantasy. This money is actually a test of parents' financial resources. If parents can get it, then the wedding can be completed. If they can't get it, the woman won't regress. So this kind of love, don't waste time. Let's go our separate ways and find the right person.
It is very important for ordinary boys to buy a house first. If parents have a sum of money and can afford a mortgage, it is recommended to buy a house first. Sometimes it's much easier to fall in love with a house.
Not everyone in the world wants a high bride price. The divorce rate is so high now. If you take out the money for buying a house and pay a bride price of 480 thousand, you will get divorced in less than a year and have no place to cry. True love, parents will understand, and will not take high bride price as an obstacle between two newcomers.
Nowadays, the problem of high bride price in rural areas has really caused great pressure on unmarried young people in rural areas. Some rural families are willing to borrow money to satisfy the woman's "lion's mouth" in order to marry their sons.
For example, a few years ago, there was a man in my village. When he got married, the woman asked for a bride price of 660 thousand, but the family could not get out at all. Parents advised their son, "Give it up and find another one, because our family simply can't afford such a colorful gift." .
However, his son thinks this woman is too beautiful. According to his own situation, it is difficult for him to meet such a beautiful girl. He insisted on not marrying this woman.
His parents can't help it. They only have this son, and his son has a crush on this girl. Moreover, the bride price of more than 600,000 yuan is also a normal market price in my hometown of Fujian.
So his parents borrowed money everywhere and finally married the girl home as they wished.
I don't know. I found out after I got married that this girl is not a living woman. After getting married, she doesn't want to go out to work with her husband. She sleeps at home until ten o'clock in the morning every day, and her mother-in-law has to cook three meals without even washing the dishes after dinner.
Moreover, the girl also heard from her neighbors that most of his bride price money was borrowed. The girl thinks that she must pay her debts in the future. Husband's salary of more than 6 thousand a month, hundreds of thousands, when will it be paid off?
Then this woman began to make trouble, saying all day long that her husband's family was incompetent and would not marry herself. What is it to lend money to your son to find a wife? Did I marry you to help you pay your debts? This word reached her husband's ear, and he slapped her angrily.
Something happened to this slap. The girl ran back to her parents' home in tears, and she never wanted to come back. She even said that she wanted a divorce.
Men are also anxious. He spent so much money looking for his daughter-in-law, and now she wants a divorce. What will the whole thing be?
So her husband can only bow his head and beg the woman's forgiveness and let her go home and live a good life. Who knows this woman is determined not to go back, saying that she was cheated at the beginning. The man obviously has no financial ability, but also borrows money to marry his wife, and now he wants to pay my debts.
It's no use persuading this woman. In desperation, her husband said that divorce was ok, but the bride price should be paid back.
Of course, the woman refused, saying, where is the bride price? Have you ever seen a bride price after divorce? I have been with you for more than a year, and everyone in the nearby village knows that we are married. Can I remarry in the future? The money should be regarded as compensation for her loss of youth and reputation.
It is impossible for the man to agree, so the two families quarreled and went to the local court.
My nephew had the same trouble. He made blind dates with girls from several villages, and the bride price was very high. However, unlike the man I mentioned above, my nephew is not sensible. He still hates these women asking for high bride price through marriage.
So my nephew also told his parents that there was no need to arrange a blind date for him. Why don't good men have wives? With his good looks (my nephew is actually a fat man of 180 kg) who can support himself, he doesn't believe that he can't find someone who is willing to marry him?
Later, my nephew really brought two girls home, one from Chongqing, who lived for a while and then broke up. The other is from the northeast. Two people got married, and now the child is over two years old.
These two girls are both said by my nephew outside. Although my nephew is a big fat man, he is thick-skinned and talkative. Neither of the two girls my nephew is looking for is very expensive.
From my nephew's example, don't spoil women who ask for high bride price. There are many fish in the sea. Why should we look for them in our village? Many rural areas in China, unlike Jiangxi and Fujian, have a bad habit of high bride price, and many areas do not want bride price.
It is understandable that the subject will feel uncomfortable. This girlfriend is from Jiangxi. She is not as reasonable as the girl my nephew is looking for. She doesn't want a bride price, she wants a sky-high price of 480 thousand.
I think to deal with this matter, the first thing is to communicate with the woman's parents first, and find out what the purpose of parents asking for a high bride price is.
Generally speaking, asking for a high bride price is something that the woman's parents will do. The purpose of asking for a high bride price varies from person to person, and some ask for it because of face.
This situation is also very common in rural areas. Although there is a strong human relationship in rural areas, the comparison in rural areas is also very serious.
For example, the bride price of Li's daughter is 6.5438+million, so if the daughter of Wang's family is less than 6.5438+million, it will be laughed at by Li's people and others in the village. It is said that Wang's daughter is not as good as Li's. Seeing that her daughter has married 65,438+million, the daughter of the Wangs is not as good as others.
As the saying goes, people's words are awesome, and sometimes the harm of language is very great. In order not to leave gossip for others, some rural parents have no choice but to follow the bride price in the village.
For such parents, it is not impossible to communicate. You can ask the woman's parents how much you gave as a bride price. In fact, you don't have to pay so much to satisfy their face.
Of course, if you just talk about it, your girlfriend's parents may not agree. At this time, the subject should show sincerity and tell his parents about his future plans, so that they can believe that you are the one who will give their daughter happiness. As long as the work of the woman's parents can be done well, there will be no problem with the bride price.
Personally, I think what I have to do at this time is the ideological work of my girlfriend. If your girlfriend really loves you and thinks she can see happiness in you, persuade her to do her parents' work, even if her girlfriend can't do her ideological work, there is no need to worry.
The premise of high bride price in rural areas is blind date first. As long as the girlfriend doesn't want to go on a blind date, or deliberately says or does something that annoys the man, then the girlfriend's blind date will never succeed.
In rural areas, if girls are older, it is generally difficult to find blind dates of the same age. At this time, the project has been working for several years and has a certain economic foundation. If she talks about marriage with her girlfriend's parents again, her girlfriend's parents will naturally give in.
Another asked for a high bride price. If so, the ending is usually not ideal.
How much is the bride price varies from place to place. There are few bridesmaids in Guangdong, Guangxi and Chongqing, but the bridesmaids in Fujian, Jiangxi, Gansu and Henan are quite tall.
In areas with high bride price, if there are unmarried boys at home, some parents will save money for their sons by marrying their daughters.
For example, the girlfriend of the subject has an unmarried brother, and it is difficult for his parents to put down the money for their son's wedding bride price in the future and promise the subject not to pay the bride price.
The countryside is also a reason to ask for a high bride price. Generally, it is the woman's parents who want the man to have an attitude, and the high bride price is just a cover.
There are also some families in our village, and their own economy is not bad, but they still ask for high bride price. There are two main reasons for asking for a high bride price. One is to see the economic strength of the man's family through the bride price. The other is to see the man's attitude towards his daughter through the bride price, and whether the daughter really loves her as the man says. What can this man do for his daughter?
If this man is scared away by the bride price, it means that this man has no responsibility, and it is hard to say that his daughter will be happy after following him. But if the man is not scared away, it means that the man really loves his daughter, and they will trust her with confidence.
After asking for a high bride price, such people will take the bride price back to their daughters' families or give them more dowry.
For example, my wife is like this. 50 thousand was given at first. Later, my wife told me that the money was in her card, and my parents never asked her for a penny.
Height is a bad habit in rural areas. Asking the man for too much money through marriage is not allowed and illegal in the latest civil code.
Personally, I don't want to indulge in high bride price, but I want to break this bad habit and not encourage the growth of this unhealthy trend.
In case of high bride price, communicate with the woman's parents first. If communication fails, you will find someone else. You know, there are still many people in rural areas who don't want bride price and low bride price.
Finally, strengthen your own strength, make yourself better, and let those parents who beat Yuanyang because of the bride price regret it.
I come from Nanchang. I haven't seen it around. I want a bride price of 480 thousand. If there is, I must change it. There must be something wrong with this family. If I want my daughter to be happy, I won't ask for such a high bride price.
You're using this as an excuse, aren't you, brother? Nanchang wants 480 thousand bride price? I have been in Nanchang 16 years, and my business level is in the range of 8.8-168,000. However, it would be nice to get married here in Nanchang and have a house in the city. The bride price for singles is absolutely unnecessary. Don't touch Nanchang
There will be no happiness after marriage. She and her family only have superficial material face and don't understand tolerance. I suggest you stop loss in time and don't drag your feet, otherwise you will regret it for the rest of your life. Making money hard is the last word. Suggest doing sales or starting a business. Doing sales from scratch, now making specialty snacks, with a monthly income of 2W+
A simple compulsion is to borrow money to write an iou or a bride price installment, as long as your girlfriend is willing to be with you, if not, I suggest you change it.
Don't hurt Nanchang people. Let's just say you're not good enough. Your parents-in-law don't like you, so quit! Maybe we can talk about getting married in five years. As the old saying goes, if a person's career takes the lead and fails to achieve great things, why should he work at home?
Since it's business, bargain first. If you still can't close the deal, you can only give up and buy something cost-effective and affordable.
Don't worry about the bride price. Give it or leave it. It's just that the transaction is tangled, and it's boring to talk about it every day.