2. Once upon a time, a poor man, when his son got married, his mother had no money to buy him underwear, so she made him an underwear with a rice bag. On my wedding night, when I took off my pants, my wife fainted on the spot. On the front of the underwear, it says: net weight is 25 kg, made in Thailand. ...
3. Several monkeys peeked at a person taking a bath. Suddenly a monkey fell from the tree laughing and asked him why he was laughing. It said: it is strange that human tail is so short that it has the face to put it in front! Laugh me to death! !
The elephant laughed at the camel and said, "Why do your breasts grow on your back?" "Hum!" The camel said, "I never talk to people with dicks on their faces!" " "The snake laughed, and the elephant said," The face is on the penis! What are you laughing at? ? "
Chickens and cows complain, "It's unfair that humans want us to lay more eggs while they plan their own families." The cow said, "What's your little grievance? So many people eat my milk, but no one calls me mom. "
6. A man goes to the toilet. The next door suddenly said, How have you been recently? Don't be rude: not bad. The next door said: What are you busy with? M: On business. Next door: I'll hang up first. There's a psycho here. He tried to answer as soon as he spoke.
7. Love is like shit. Once the water is washed away, it will never come back. Love is like shit, it can't stop when it comes. Love is like shit, it's the same every time, but it's different. Love is like shit, sometimes it's just a fart after a long effort.
8. The bird flew out of the forest in a bulletproof suit and soon came back with a gunshot wound. The squirrel saw it and asked, Why did you get shot in a bulletproof vest? The bird said, "damn it, I will never strip again!" “
9. Sleeping in death: I am so excited to sleep with beautiful women; Sleep with your lover; Sleeping with ugly girls is boring to death; Sleeping with dancers is expensive to death; Sleeping with a powerful woman is exhausting to death; Sleeping with a virgin is stupid to death; Sleep with your wife all night and play dead.
10, I've always wanted to know what it's like to be loved ... so many people get hurt!
1 1. Once I looked up at the starry sky with my friends, and then we burst into tears. He was lovelorn and I sprained my neck.
12, he's just a pot of water, pour it into your rice pile. After several years, the clear water becomes mellow wine, and you become a pile of abandoned rotten rice, which is not useless and can also be used to feed pigs.
13, the beauty of learning lies in confusing people; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in her stupidity without regrets; The beauty of a man lies in lying.
14, Panda Man wants QJ Panda Girl, Panda Girl struggles and vows to die. After the failure, Panda Man said angrily, "We are all going extinct!" "
15, one day, the cow gave the donkey a difficult problem and asked which of the two bugs under the word "stupid" was male and which was female. The donkey racked his brains, but he still couldn't answer. Cow scolds: What an ass, male left and female right!
16, the tortoise is ill, let the snail buy medicine. Three hours passed and the snail didn't come back. The tortoise cursed, "If you don't come back, I'll die." At this time, the snail's voice came from outside the door: "I won't leave if you fucking scold me again!" "
17, Husband: What time is it? Wife: Ten o'clock. Husband: Is it complete? Wife: It's too early. The others are still awake! Husband: I mean, is it ten o'clock sharp? Madame ...
18, 10. A child was sitting at the door playing and a middle-aged man asked him, "Is your father at home?" The child replied, "at home." The middle-aged man rang the doorbell for a long time, but no one answered the door. So the man asked angrily, "Why don't you open the door?" The little boy replied, "I don't know, this is not home!" " "
I don't want to fill in the blanks any more. If both of them fail, forget it.
This story happened in China a long time ago.
After playing a guessing game with scissors, stones and cloth all afternoon, my good friends.
Go home together, take a walk …
Si Tong noticed an oil lamp by the roadside, just like Aladdin's magic lamp.
He picked it up curiously and dusted it off.
Suddenly, white smoke came out of the bottle of Ran Ran magic lamp.
A dragon slowly emerged from the white smoke. ..
But the dragon is dry and a little malnourished.
He said, "Who let me out?" Fuzzy
Stone said: I let you out.
Dragon: "Oh … Ahem … Then I can give you a wish …" "
Si Tong: "Ah ... only one. Oh, there are three. "
Dragon: "I'm sorry ... because I'm a half-toned dragon ... if you don't want to, forget it ..." "
Si Tong: "OK ... and then ... can you make all three of us adults?" We are tired of guessing boxing every day. "
Dragon: "Oh ... I will try … but maybe only one can succeed … because I am a semitone dragon …" "
The dragon coughed a few times and spat at the three of them respectively.
The three people gradually began to be shrouded in white smoke, and the dragon gradually disappeared into the three-character sutra.
Wait until the white smoke clears. ...
Stone or stone, scissors or scissors, only cloth is no longer cloth, and cloth has been successfully transformed into human beings!
When one family is happy and two families are sad,
Someone happened to pass by here and saw this scene.
I recorded him,
This man is Mencius.
He wrote:
…………….
Cloth succeeded and became a person.
Later, this statement spread to later generations, and Chinese textbooks were added.
The old man in the family died,
Because of the public sacrifice, the body was frozen.
Please come out after the public sacrifice.
It happened to be hot at that time,
There were thawed water droplets on the body,
Grandson beside to see, very nervous shout loudly:
"Grandma, grandma ... grandpa is sweating ..."
Grandma replied:
"Shh ... Grandpa died for the first time, so nervous! 」
One day, a man met God. ..
God suddenly kindly gave the man a wish.
God asked …
Do you have any wishes …
The man wanted to think. ...
I heard that cats have nine lives. ...
Then please give me nine lives. ..
God said, ..
Your wish has come true. ...
One day, that man was idle and bored …
I want to say die. ...
There are nine lives anyway
Lying on the tracks ...
As a result, a train passed by. ...
That man is still dead ...
Why is this?
Because that train has 10 cars …
A lady ran into a red light halfway through her car.
The traffic policeman next to her watched her as the red light turned green and the green light turned red …
Still parked in the middle of the road, motionless.
So the traffic police went over and asked the lady, "What's the matter, don't you have a favorite color?" 」
Have you been dating her for many years?
There seem to be fewer phones recently.
I feel weak.
Ask her why
She just lowered her head and said nothing. ...
I don't know what to do.
After all ... feelings can't be forced.
Listen to your friends.
She has been close to a man recently.
I can't believe it.
I don't want to believe it
Because ... I really like her. ...
But ... that day in the street.
I can't believe I saw her with another him.
Hand in hand
Very intimate joke.
instant
My heart ... is broken. ...
Through my investigation
Only then did I know that he turned out to be a medical student.
There is also a big hospital at home.
I am a third-rate college student, so I can't compare with it. .....
I have been unable to sleep these days.
Do you still want to save our feelings? .....
I thought about it for a long time.
Decided to send her an apple every day.
because
I believe
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away. “
On one night, ...
Xiaoming couldn't sleep, so he decided to go out for a walk …
He just walked on the highway near his home …
Unfortunately, I was caught in a police raid. ...
Xiao Ming was called for questioning.
The policeman asked Xiao Ming why he got on the highway, and handed him a ticket after asking.
It says
1. Not wearing a seat belt
2. Driving without a license
The speed is less than 60 miles per hour
This is what I answered, and I will copy it to you. There are many, so you can choose for yourself. Also, I quite agree with what Oo Xiaodong said, this score is really not so good ~
A group of great scientists played hide-and-seek in heaven after their death. It's Einstein's turn to arrest people. He counted to 100 and opened his eyes. He saw everyone hiding, but Newton was still standing there. Einstein walked over and said, "Newton, I got you." Newton: "No, you didn't catch Newton." Einstein: "You are not Newton. Who are you? " Newton: "What do you see under my feet?" Einstein looked down and saw Newton standing on a square floor tile with a length and width of one meter, puzzled. Newton: "This is a square meter under my feet. When I stand on it, it is Newton/square meter, so you didn't catch Newton, you caught * * *."
…… …… …… ……
pascal
When a boy had sex with a girl, the girl received an offer from Duke University. At the boarding gate of the airport, the girl anxiously looked at the figure of the lady here. But when the familiar body really appeared in front of her, the girl dared not look at the attachment in each other's eyes.
"If you ask me to stay, I will give up studying abroad." The girl secretly made up her mind. I saw the boy take out a beautifully packaged gift box with a mechanical watch that stopped the needle. The boy gently put the watch on the girl's wrist, wound it up, let go, and the stopped watch hand began to circle again.
"Yes, everyone will have a new beginning, so why insist on this moment?" The girl thought, shook her hand and walked quickly into the boarding passage. There was no hesitation in her heart, only the sobbing back touched her heartstrings slightly.
Sixty years later, the girl's temples are covered with snow, and she is packing at her home in Boston, ready to move. The American wife outside is coaxing her grandchildren into the car. Suddenly, the mechanical watch at the bottom of the box suddenly appeared in front of her, and the memory suddenly returned to the airport 60 years ago. The "girl" sighed, wiped the surface, wound the spring, let go of her hand, and the stopped watch hand began to circle again. ...
My wife shouted many times outside, but didn't hear the "girl" response. When she entered the house, she saw that she was holding an old-fashioned tearful eye.
-What does that mean? . . . What the boy wants to express is that the watch is gone. . .
It's freezing. ! !
A man was out on a business trip and suddenly came home. He heard a man snoring at the door.
The man walked away silently and sent a short message to his wife: "Divorce!" ! ! "
Then I threw away my mobile phone card and left. ...
They met again in a city three years later.
The wife asked: Why did you leave without saying goodbye?
The man said the situation at that time.
The wife turned around,
Simply put: that's Rising's little lion.
My English teacher always likes to ask questions in class. Whenever someone is asked to answer a question, he always asks: Can you? That means you can.
One day we learned the word born, the meaning of fertility, and then she gave an example: a sow can give birth to ten piglets at a time, and then ask a boy to translate. After the boy stood up, the teacher didn't forget to ask, is that okay? The boy replied: I won't.
After ten seconds of silence, the whole class laughed.
One night, when I was on duty, someone reported that a drunken man was making trouble in front of his shop, so we took him back to the police station and "restrained him until he woke up." When the man arrived at the police station, he was still unconscious and hit his head with his mobile phone. The leader was afraid of an accident, so he put away his mobile phone and put it in the duty room for me to look after.
This is a magical cottage machine. I have a rough look, there are 9 speakers! ! ! This is a terrible thing. Someone has been calling this mobile phone, and the ringtone is "Wolf falls in love with sheep". God, the phone keeps ringing. The ringtone of the mobile phone is at least 100 decibel, so big that even the general sound is covered up. I answered the phone, and the caller was drunk and unable to communicate. I want to turn it off, I need a password! ! ! I want to wait until he runs out of power before turning off his phone. He has been on the phone for more than two hours and hasn't used up a grid of electricity! ! !
I thought, okay, I'll pull out the battery. What a clever mistake! I made the worst decision of my life! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! As soon as the battery is pulled out, this mobile phone actually has an alarm sound. Yes, it's like a siren, louder than the alarm of our police car. Where did you say the battery was missing? It's been ringing for more than ten minutes, so I can't help it. I can only put the battery back, turn it on, and continue to sing Wolf in Love with Sheep.
At 2 o'clock in the morning, the man finally woke up and could communicate normally. I returned his mobile phone to him in tears and told him to leave the police station quickly and let me live.
One day in the street. Walk.
A girl knelt on the ground and cried. Cry until everyone is watching and ask her what's wrong. . .
She said: lost. . . . .
A young man is wearing a white T-shirt. The main point is that there are three bars (Adidas) on the left and right sleeves and a big checkmark (Nike) on the back. I feel dizzy and my chest is kappa. . . .
Once at about 10 in the evening, I went home by bike.
Inactive lane
There is a man dangling in a battery car.
I think maybe I'm drunk, so I'd better keep my distance.
I was just thinking, suddenly the car in front fell down and the man fell down.
I rode past him to see what had happened.
He said to himself, Mara is next door, asleep! ~
At about 9 o'clock in the midsummer night, I drove by a road. I was surprised to see the unknown woman sitting on a motorcycle by the side of the road, with a intoxicated look on her face. I kept inciting. There was a faint gasp "Oh ... Uh ...". Look carefully, Gao, make love in this street. Scanning around, everyone in the car and on the road looks like a thunder, which can be summarized as follows:
Daughters-"(▽)? -& gt； ! (@ [] @)!
Man-"(▽)? -& gt； （ˉ▽~）-& gt； ( 》▽》)
Minor-"_?
The elderly-"(--) ╯
Someone went to eat noodles and shouted, Boss, have one or two beef noodles.
Pause for two seconds, then continue to shout: more beef, noodles and lettuce leaves.
The boss is unhappy: you eat 2 Liang.
The man's voice is still very loud: there is too much money to eat.
A man in his thirties.
A man and a woman are fighting, both in their thirties. Women are typical bitches. The woman said that she couldn't beat the man. She reached into her pants, took out the bloody Wall Street Journal and stuffed it into the man's mouth.
Last time, I had to take a bus with my boyfriend. The row in front of us is the junction of a seat and two positions, that is to say, from the front row, there is a position for two people, but there is a position that protrudes outward (I don't like to do this kind of seat, the front is empty ~ insecure, and it is easy for the whole person to throw it out when braking suddenly) ~ Most buses in Shanghai have this kind of seat. Sitting in a prominent position in front of us is a GG, which looks ok. When the bus arrived at the station, a fat MM came over. At that time, the bus was relatively empty, and there were quite a lot of vacancies. MM went straight to the handsome guy in our front row. At this moment, my boyfriend whispered to me: Look, that woman is going to be abnormal. . Before he could finish, the bus started, and MM stumbled all the way to the handsome guy ~ ~ As a result, it was conceivable that the fat MM fell into the handsome guy's arms ~ ~ I could only bite my lip with BF ~ ~ before laughing ~ ~
My roommate lost a lot of blood on a special day. She didn't know, so she gave it away after class. In the second class, a boy sat in that seat. After class, there was blood on the back of his pants. We witnessed him leave in silence. ....
At about 5 pm one day last summer, at the busiest intersection of the busiest commercial pedestrian street in our city, a garbage collector put all the plastic bottles in a trash can in the middle of the road into her bag, then pulled out the trash can and began to poop in the bucket. There are countless passers-by around ... all black lines ...
Two days ago, I witnessed a dog's blood story on the busiest commercial pedestrian street in our city. The process is as follows:
A man and a woman are pandering in the distance. They are both wearing uniforms of the Italian football team. The woman has a good figure and the man is tall and handsome.
The woman flew into a rage, while the man struggled to stay behind. He just wouldn't let go of her arm.
The woman flew into a rage and shook her arm, and the man was thrown in front of the woman.
The man hugged the woman, and the woman began to struggle, kicking and hitting, and brutally stepping on the man's foot.
The man refused to let go, and the woman struggled to break free and began to run wildly.
The man grabbed the woman and dragged her to the street next to the blue board of a construction site fence. On the way, the woman struggled to break free.
The man threw the woman on the blue board, put his hand on the fence and began to kiss.
The woman broke free while kicking, but the man clung to it.
The woman slapped her in the face, and the man not only didn't get angry, but also hugged the woman tightly.
The woman struggled a few times and finally calmed down. ...........
Everyone stared at their backs hugging each other in the sunset, with black lines on their faces.
The worst thing is that the male and female host didn't say a word all the time, even the commonly used onomatopoeia words "en", "ah" and swearing words didn't appear, as if it were a fierce silent movie.
A temple.
Monk: Donate some money, just 3500.
Me: I don't have that much money. Maybe next time.
Monk: Never mind. We can swipe our cards here.
Me: Sorry, I don't have my card either.
Monk: Never mind. We can also mortgage here, and the monthly interest rate is only 3%.
Me: Sorry, I have nothing to mortgage.
Monk: Please fill out this organ donation form.
In the past, monkeys were big, and they were dishonest. They often rob passers-by of their property. After being robbed several times, a vegetable farmer still couldn't swallow this tone. "Always find a way to cure them!" After observation, he found that monkeys like to imitate human movements, and they are also very indomitable.
Great, finally there is a way. When ready, the vegetable farmer put two radishes-a green radish and a carrot-in his crotch and went up the hill. Finally, I waited for these monkeys on the mountainside. The vegetable farmers are not in a hurry, and the spectators and monkeys are watching. As long as they see what they want, they will do it at once. At this time, vegetable farmers are not in a hurry, and they don't pay attention to the baskets that usually contain vegetables. They just take out the guy in pants and play with him in their hands. The monkeys didn't know what the vegetable farmers were doing at first, but soon they couldn't help learning and took out their own guys to play with. After a while, the vegetable farmer's guy and the monkey's guy grew up. While the monkeys were not paying attention, the vegetable farmers changed their families into carrots, and they were still playing with carrots, rubbing them hard from time to time. After a while, the monkeys noticed that the vegetable farmers' things were "red"! Monkeys are unwilling, rub, rub and rub! Finally, an hour later, they were all popular. When the vegetable farmers saw that the temperature was almost the same, they threw away the carrots and replaced them with green radishes while the monkeys were not paying attention! Still playing there, only the friction is worse. Monkeys are finally red, but when they see the food of vegetable farmers, they are "green"! Can't lose! The monkeys are working hard again, rubbing, rubbing, rubbing and rubbing. .......................................................................................................................................................
When the vegetable farmers saw it, it was time! I saw the vegetable farmer break off the green radish in his hand! It broke in an instant. Now the monkeys are in a hurry, and they all break off their guys! ........... is all broken!
Since then, the monkey has collapsed and become smaller and smaller. ..........
Last week, on the sidewalk of Tianhe South Road in front of Guangzhou Book Center. A man panicked and rushed out of the snack bar and ran to the road.
Behind her, a woman chased her, holding a hundred-dollar bill in her left hand and a kitchen knife in her right hand, screaming in Mandarin: "Give me back my virginity! Give me back my virginity! " , a look of heartbreak.
(At that time, I thought, is it because that man played a rogue and didn't give enough money to be hunted down? )
Probably seeing a woman chasing her with a knife, the man had to stop and say to her, "OK, I will pay you back."
(I don't understand it. Aren't you stealing people's virginity and money? Oh, my God, this is immoral! Get him and kill him. )
I saw that the woman gave the man a hundred-dollar bill, and the man gave the woman dozens of dollars.
The more I watch it, the more confused I am. How can I take away other people's chastity to make money? Look at this man's face again. If he can be a "second husband", old sows can climb trees. )
People can't understand the ending of Sanqu.
(I woke up today and remembered this moment. I suddenly realized that the man had paid counterfeit money and was chased by the snack bar owner: "Give me back the real money!" " " )
The funeral procession downstairs is playing "Go home often" ... I don't know what my family thinks. ...
This story happened in China a long time ago.
After playing a guessing game with scissors, stones and cloth all afternoon, my good friends.
Go home together, take a walk …
Si Tong noticed an oil lamp by the roadside, just like Aladdin's magic lamp.
He picked it up curiously and dusted it off.
Suddenly, white smoke came out of the bottle of Ran Ran magic lamp.
A dragon slowly emerged from the white smoke. ..
But the dragon is dry and a little malnourished.
He said, "Who let me out?" Fuzzy
Stone said: I let you out.
Dragon: "Oh … Ahem … Then I can give you a wish …" "
Si Tong: "Ah ... only one. Oh, there are three. "
Dragon: "I'm sorry ... because I'm a half-toned dragon ... if you don't want to, forget it ..." "
Si Tong: "OK ... and then ... can you make all three of us adults?" We are tired of guessing boxing every day. "
Dragon: "Oh ... I will try … but maybe only one can succeed … because I am a semitone dragon …" "
The dragon coughed a few times and spat at the three of them respectively.
The three people gradually began to be shrouded in white smoke, and the dragon gradually disappeared into the three-character sutra.
Wait until the white smoke clears. ...
Stone or stone, scissors or scissors, only cloth is no longer cloth, and cloth has been successfully transformed into human beings!
When one family is happy and two families are sad,
Someone happened to pass by here and saw this scene.
I recorded him,
This man is Mencius.
He wrote:
…………….
Cloth succeeded and became a person.
Later, this statement spread to later generations, and Chinese textbooks were added.
The old man in the family died,
Because of the public sacrifice, the body was frozen.
Please come out after the public sacrifice.
It happened to be hot at that time,
There were thawed water droplets on the body,
Grandson beside to see, very nervous shout loudly:
"Grandma, grandma ... grandpa is sweating ..."
Grandma replied:
"Shh ... Grandpa died for the first time, so nervous! 」
One day, a man met God. ..
God suddenly kindly gave the man a wish.
God asked …
Do you have any wishes …
The man wanted to think. ...
I heard that cats have nine lives. ...
Then please give me nine lives. ..
God said, ..
Your wish has come true. ...
One day, that man was idle and bored …
I want to say die. ...
There are nine lives anyway
Lying on the tracks ...
As a result, a train passed by. ...
That man is still dead ...
Why is this?
Because that train has 10 cars …
A lady ran into a red light halfway through her car.
The traffic policeman next to her watched her as the red light turned green and the green light turned red …
Still parked in the middle of the road, motionless.
So the traffic police went over and asked the lady, "What's the matter, don't you have a favorite color?" 」
Have you been dating her for many years?
There seem to be fewer phones recently.
I feel weak.
Ask her why
She just lowered her head and said nothing. ...
I don't know what to do.
After all ... feelings can't be forced.
Listen to your friends.
She has been close to a man recently.
I can't believe it.
I don't want to believe it
Because ... I really like her. ...
But ... that day in the street.
I can't believe I saw her with another him.
Hand in hand
Very intimate joke.
instant
My heart ... is broken. ...
Through my investigation
Only then did I know that he turned out to be a medical student.
There is also a big hospital at home.
I am a third-rate college student, so I can't compare with it. .....
I have been unable to sleep these days.
Do you still want to save our feelings? .....
I thought about it for a long time.
Decided to send her an apple every day.
because
I believe
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away. “
On one night, ...
Xiaoming couldn't sleep, so he decided to go out for a walk …
He just walked on the highway near his home …
Unfortunately, I was caught in a police raid. ...
Xiao Ming was called for questioning.
The policeman asked Xiao Ming why he got on the highway, and handed him a ticket after asking.
It says
1. Not wearing a seat belt
2. Driving without a license
The speed is less than 60 miles per hour
This is what I answered, and I will copy it to you. There are many, so you can choose for yourself. Also, I quite agree with what Oo Xiaodong said, this score is really not so good ~
A group of great scientists played hide-and-seek in heaven after their death. It's Einstein's turn to arrest people. He counted to 100 and opened his eyes. He saw everyone hiding, but Newton was still standing there. Einstein walked over and said, "Newton, I got you." Newton: "No, you didn't catch Newton." Einstein: "You are not Newton. Who are you? " Newton: "What do you see under my feet?" Einstein looked down and saw Newton standing on a square floor tile with a length and width of one meter, puzzled. Newton: "This is a square meter under my feet. When I stand on it, it is Newton/square meter, so you didn't catch Newton, you caught * * *."
…… …… …… ……
pascal
When a boy had sex with a girl, the girl received an offer from Duke University. At the boarding gate of the airport, the girl anxiously looked at the figure of the lady here. But when the familiar body really appeared in front of her, the girl dared not look at the attachment in each other's eyes.
"If you ask me to stay, I will give up studying abroad." The girl secretly made up her mind. I saw the boy take out a beautifully packaged gift box with a mechanical watch that stopped the needle. The boy gently put the watch on the girl's wrist, wound it up, let go, and the stopped watch hand began to circle again.
"Yes, everyone will have a new beginning, so why insist on this moment?" The girl thought, shook her hand and walked quickly into the boarding passage. There was no hesitation in her heart, only the sobbing back touched her heartstrings slightly.
Sixty years later, the girl's temples are covered with snow, and she is packing at her home in Boston, ready to move. The American wife outside is coaxing her grandchildren into the car. Suddenly, the mechanical watch at the bottom of the box suddenly appeared in front of her, and the memory suddenly returned to the airport 60 years ago. The "girl" sighed, wiped the surface, wound the spring, let go of her hand, and the stopped watch hand began to circle again. ...
My wife shouted many times outside, but didn't hear the "girl" response. When she entered the house, she saw that she was holding an old-fashioned tearful eye.
-What does that mean? . . . What the boy wants to express is that the watch is gone. . .
It's freezing. ! !
A man was out on a business trip and suddenly came home. He heard a man snoring at the door.
The man walked away silently and sent a short message to his wife: "Divorce!" ! ! "
Then I threw away my mobile phone card and left. ...
They met again in a city three years later.
The wife asked: Why did you leave without saying goodbye?
The man said the situation at that time.
The wife turned around,
Simply put: that's Rising's little lion.
My English teacher always likes to ask questions in class. Whenever someone is asked to answer a question, he always asks: Can you? That means you can.
One day we learned the word born, the meaning of fertility, and then she gave an example: a sow can give birth to ten piglets at a time, and then ask a boy to translate. After the boy stood up, the teacher didn't forget to ask, is that okay? The boy replied: I won't.
After ten seconds of silence, the whole class laughed.
1: Once upon a time, a man fished and caught a squid.
Squid begged him: let me go, don't bake me to eat.
The man said, well, let me ask you some questions.
The squid said happily, take the exam!
Then this man roasted the squid. ..
2: I used to have schizophrenia, but now we have recovered.
An international student is taking a driver's license test in America, and the road sign ahead prompts him to turn left. He is not sure, ask the examiner:
"Turn left?"
A: "Yes"
So ... hang up. ..
4: One day, Mung Bean committed suicide, jumped down from the fifth floor, shed a lot of blood and became a red bean; Pushed all the time and turned into soybeans; The wound was scarred and finally turned into black beans.
Xiaoming cut his hair and came to school the next day. The students all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged and ran outside to cry. Cry, cry ~ he flew ...
6: There was a man who looked like an onion and cried when he walked.
7: The little penguin asked his grandmother one day, "Grandma, am I a penguin?" "Yes, of course you are a penguin." The little penguin asks his father again, "Dad, Dad, am I a penguin?" "Yes, you are a penguin. What's wrong? " "But, but why do I feel so cold?"
8: A pair of corn fell in love …
So they decided to get married …
Wedding day ...
One corn can't find another corn …
This corn asks the popcorn next to it: Have you seen our corn?
Popcorn: Honey, I'm wearing a wedding dress.