Liao grew up in a bad living environment, and his three-year college tuition was all loans. After graduation, it took her two years to pay off the loan. Then I met her first love and now I meet her husband.
When engaged, the man gave a bride price of 50 thousand. These betrothal gifts are all deducted by parents, but they are all dowry and have no meaning. Fortunately, my husband's family didn't take this matter to heart, but only occasionally mentioned that Liao's parents were wrong.
In fact, for Liao, she thinks that married life will not be as tense as before. It never occurred to me that, in fact, my husband's house is fake, and actually there is not much money.
Liao's monthly salary is 3000 yuan, minus living expenses, bus fare and money for going out to parties occasionally, there is almost nothing. Her husband can be a little more, about 6000 a month.
The combined salary of two people is quite moist in this city. Unexpectedly, the child turned out to be two people.
In-laws high school also has a little son who delivers meals to him almost every week. So my in-laws can't take care of her children. And his mother, who is smart all day, will never come to see the children herself. If you don't resign, you need to hire a nanny or crescent moon, but the monthly salary will hardly be less than 10 thousand.
Liao calculated that almost all expenses related to children can exceed her salary, and with the monthly expenses, the total salary of her and her husband can't be compared. So after thinking about it, it's better to let her leave her job and take her children to be a full-time mother.
Just when she wanted to find a reason to tell her husband what she thought, something happened.
On this day, my husband entertained me at night and got drunk when he got home. Liao reached out to help him. He wants to take off his shoes and clothes, wipe his face with a towel and have a comfortable sleep.
But before she took off her husband's clothes, he suddenly slapped her backhand and muttered, "You earned 3,000, only 3,000. Can we afford to raise children? " If you look at other people's wives, you can't say that you earn more than men, but there are at least 5 thousand. How can I marry such a useless thing as you? My family can't count on it! "
Hearing this, Liao couldn't help shuddering. So this is my position in my husband's heart, which is this position. She touched her belly and made a decision.
Later, after her husband woke up, he kept apologizing to Liao. He said she was wrong, not on purpose. This child has to do this. He works harder and can afford to raise a child anyway.
Liao forgave her husband. A couple, she also knows her husband's difficulties. But that doesn't mean she can forgive what she said that night. Her husband's slap made her realize that she wanted to be a full-time mother. Anyway, she can't lose her job, even if it's only 3000 yuan.
For stay-at-home mothers, most of them are biased. Born in 1982 in Jin Zhiying, this woman used to sit outside and have coffee with her children. At this moment, a man said, "Look how comfortable she lives. She spends her husband's money, drinks coffee and goes wherever she wants. "
The hostess listened and left without saying anything. For stay-at-home mothers, this kind of "slander" is too much.
It seems that in everyone's eyes, stay-at-home mothers are always considered as "leisure jobs" that can lie at home and rest at any time, but this is not the case. Stay-at-home mothers are as hard and hard as professional women.
In fact, the most important thing for a person to take care of children is to grasp the rhythm. A qualified full-time mother should have a magic weapon to make herself happy.
My friend Wu Yu is a stay-at-home mom, and she has a lot of research and feelings in this respect. When Wu Yugang was a stay-at-home mom, she was also anxious. Every day, she closes her eyes beside her children. There seems to be nothing but children. She seldom socializes and seems to be trapped inside. She is depressed, irritable and angry with her husband and mother-in-law.
Seeing that the contradiction in this family is getting deeper and deeper, Wu Yu feels that this is not good and can't go on like this. So, she began to make time and learn to relax. Every weekend, she gives herself a holiday, does not breastfeed her children, and does not take care of them at night. These two days are spent socializing, shopping, studying, reading, or just chasing TV dramas.
In less than two months, she felt that her mind had changed. Not as anxious as before, but more relaxed than before.
This makes Wu Yu feel how important it is for stay-at-home mothers to learn to adjust their emotions. If you spend more time with your children, anxiety will run around in your brain. What you need to do at this time is not to vent, but to guide. Even crying is relaxing.
In addition, stay-at-home mothers may try to plan the future of themselves, their children and even their families while relaxing. You can also make a feasible plan for your future. For example, when the child is older, you plan to go back to work. For example, do you have a promising job and what efforts do you need to make for it in your full-time career? Maybe when you are willing to try, you will find other possibilities, such as the skill of realizing that full-time nannies can also make money. Many stay-at-home mothers actually have their own ways of making money. In the process of being a full-time mother, it is very important to realize self-appreciation.
"Mother's Evolution" also said: "As mothers, our own fuel tank needs to be filled, so that overflowing love can radiate to others."
Only when you come to be a mother. Whether you are a stay-at-home mom or a working mom, what parents do for their children. Circumstances and roles never make stay-at-home mothers divorced from society, but what makes stay-at-home mothers divorced from society is human inertia. It is extremely important for full-time mothers to enrich themselves in their spare time, keep socializing, study hard and have confidence in their efforts.
Stay-at-home mothers are not terrible or inevitable. As long as we have a reasonable plan, stay-at-home mothers can have their own world.