In today's society, men and women are facing the same fierce competition. How can I raise my daughter better? There is a lot of hot discussion on the internet now.
Some people think that raising girls is to provide a rich material foundation; However, more and more people believe that training girls means giving them enough spiritual nourishment.
I think, if my own conditions permit, I should provide good material support for my daughter and pay attention to her spiritual enrichment at the same time.
(A) the lack of material and spiritual nourishment will lead to a person's inner poverty.
And what will it be like for a girl who has neither material nor spiritual upbringing?
Just like Eugenie Grandet, she is a girl whose material life and spiritual life have not been enriched.
Eugenie Grandet is a novel by Balzac, a French realistic critical novelist, which is included in Human Comedy.
Stills of Eugenie Grandet
Father Grandet is the richest man in the area, but the miser is very strict with his family. Money can only go in and out in his hand. Eugénie grew up with her mother, doing needlework done by inferior maids all day, and the whole family could only use one candle.
Even on Eugénie's birthday every year, her father gave her gold coins, but she was not allowed to spend a penny. All of them are kept as dowry at the bottom of the wardrobe, and her father counts the number of gold coins every year.
Moreover, his father Grandet deducted Eugénie's mother's living expenses, and the poor mother never even had the opportunity and money to buy something that really belonged to her.
Stage photo
Eugénie was deeply influenced by his father's frugality. In order to save money, Grande Law refused to let his daughter receive any formal education. Eugénie, who grew up in this environment, is kind and simple, but he has hardly seen the world.
On my 23rd birthday, I met my cousin Charlie from Paris. She thought he was dressed beautifully, just like a fairy from the sky. Therefore, Eugénie fell in love with Charlie for the first time in his life.
Knowing that Charlie was going to India to look for business opportunities, Eugénie generously gave all the gold he had accumulated for more than ten years to Charlie. And therefore rebelled against his father, and his mother was frightened by this incident and died.
I haven't heard from Charlie since he left, nor have I written to Eugénie. One day seven years later, Eugénie finally expected a letter from Charlie, but the content was a desperate farewell letter.
After reading the letter, Eugénie simply resigned from his mother's post and took out three million francs to pay off the debts owed by Charlie, so as to restore his reputation and marry his noble daughter.
Eugénie's unrequited love for love is actually a reflection of the barren inner world.
Although Eugénie was an only child since she was a child, she never received any formal education and study, and she never received real care from her father.
Such Eugénie will be deceived by Charlie's sweet words and think that this is true love.
A girl who has never been mentally full is barren and unconfident. Putting her happiness on others is doomed to be unhappy.
(b) True wealth is spiritual independence.
In fact, the real enrichment is not a material requirement, but a spiritual tempering and forging, which gives her the ability to control her destiny.
Lin, a talented woman in the Republic of China, was born in a noble family. /kloc-When he was 0/6 years old, he traveled around Europe with his father Lin Changmin and received a new western education.
Lin's photo
Father took Lin to Europe for three purposes:
First, let the daughter increase her knowledge on the road; The second is to be with him and know what he is thinking and worried about; The third is to temporarily get rid of the complicated things in the family and pave the way for improving the society in the future.
In Cambridge, England, sixteen-year-old Lin met the talented Xu Zhimo. Xu Zhimo fell in love with Lin and divorced him. This vigorous love ended in Lin's refusal.
She said that Xu Zhimo loves not the real her, but the forest he imagined in his heart.
Lin then followed his father back to China and got engaged to Liang Sicheng, the son of Liang Qichao.
Liang Sicheng's family is well-off, generous and gentle, and knowledgeable. They have the same academic pursuit. In the decades after marriage, they have been raising Lin with AIDS, and their marriage is happy.
Lin once said: The best love is to give you strength.
The real enrichment is to cultivate children's spiritual independence. We should take a long-term view and not be moved by short-term interests.
Lin, who has lofty ideals and broad horizons, deeply understands that a happy marriage is not just love, but also needs to be a better self nourished by love.
(3) Only paying attention to material richness may bring disaster.
It is often said that money is not everything, but it is absolutely impossible without money.
Money can buy many things, lots of food, gorgeous clothes, expensive jewelry and luxurious banquets, but it can't buy affection, love and health.
Real wealth cannot be solved by money.
I believe everyone still remembers the news that some time ago, foreign students who made a lot of noise on the Internet insulted their father because of the living expenses. My father is in his fifties, earning 14,000 yuan a month, and giving 10,000 yuan to his daughter who is studying in Spain.
Save money to support my daughter's study abroad. 2 1 year-old daughter is not grateful at all, and even insults her father in a circle of friends because her father is a few days late.
I once had a neighbor, Nana, whose parents were ordinary migrant workers, and her family was not particularly rich. However, Nana's demands are obedient, and she tries her best to satisfy her whatever she wants.
After Nana went to college, her living expenses were also at the middle level among her classmates. As long as she doesn't spend money indiscriminately, the living expenses are completely enough. However, Nana saw that all the students with rich families around her were using high-end cosmetics and buying beautiful clothes and bags.
Under the influence of vanity, I secretly borrowed online loans and bought a luxury bag. Later, out of control, usury was profitable, and more than 200,000 online loans were owed at once.
This last thing had a bad influence on the school, and Nana was also dropped out of school. When parents are old, they have to help Nana pay back huge loans every month.
Raising a daughter is not to meet the material needs of children blindly, but to let children know how to consume rationally and not blindly follow. It is also necessary to educate children and cultivate their correct views on money and consumption from an early age.
Blind wealth may bring an ungrateful daughter. Many parents' understanding of enrichment is to make every effort to support and satisfy their children financially so that they will not be coaxed away by a lollipop when they grow up.
However, such education may also teach children to get something for nothing, so that children can become greenhouse flowers that only care about enjoyment and don't know the sufferings of the world.
In the event of a storm, she has no adaptability at all, and will only blame her parents, not herself.
(d) What we have to do is how to raise girls better.
To raise a daughter better, it is necessary to give her a family full of tolerance and love, which is the best life gift for her parents.
First, give your daughter a loving family environment and pay attention to her thoughts instead of helping them make choices. You can help analyze and provide ideas, but the final choice lies with them.
Second, teach your daughter to be confident, try more, pay attention to the degree of encouragement, and don't indulge her child's nature too much, instead of being blind and arrogant.
Third, teach your daughter to be content, so that she won't envy what others have. Cultivate them to be more independent, be proud of their independence, and not be confused by others' sugar-coated shells.
Fourth, let her daughter read more books, take her daughter to see the world, and enrich her pattern and vision.
Let your daughter read more books. Her mind is full of poems and books. Reading can change a person's appearance and enrich her connotation.
Show your daughter more about the world. A person's pattern and vision are the key to determine her quality of life.