Recently, Xiaohongshu always sends me some selfies about the life of a full-time housewife. Basically, full-time housewives take care of their babies at home, such as the bitterness of quitting a job with a monthly salary of 30 thousand and taking care of their babies at home full-time, and the ordinary life with three children. ...
Seeing the following comments, some people have the same doubts as me: What did I do wrong, and big data wants to push this to me?
I don't think I'm interested in this kind of video, but big data said to me, "I don't want you to think, I want you to be interested in it."
However, while swearing, I still can't help but be curious. I ordered another "get up at five o'clock in the morning to make breakfast for my family", and then I was shocked by UP's dark cooking. After reading the comments, I complained about her rough work, and I ordered her other videos. ...
Her other videos are basically about these contents, which are nothing more than getting up early every day to carefully prepare three meals for her family, sending her children to school, and everyone will film her cooking or eating as a family.
In this way, with the feeling that "this video will definitely be sprayed again", I watched several of her videos in a row, and every time I saw the following comments, it was really a curse.
I really can't blame everyone for being full of malice. Watching her video, the breakfast every day is to beat soybean milk, pumpkin or whole grains, steam some sweet potatoes or eggs, fry a hand-grabbed cake and put two greasy fried sausages.
It is difficult to make a cake at a time, but it is just to mix eggs, milk and water evenly and steam them in an electric rice cooker. Really loves her children, and she can eat well!
Many experienced mothers in the comment area have left messages reminding that these foods are basically carbohydrates, which are not good for children's health. It is better to buy some bread and milk, so that she doesn't have to get up early every day and her children can eat nutritious food.
Others say that school meals in big cities are good now, and children can eat them at school, which is definitely better than her.
But the mother seems to completely ignore everyone's comments, insisting that "what she cooks is definitely healthier than outside" and repeating her complicated breakfast with no nutritional value every day.
Lunch and dinner are either heavy food, semi-processed pickled fish, sausages, preserved fish and bacon, or all kinds of stir-fried stews that look unattractive.
Someone humorously summed up her cooking style, adding soy sauce and water to the pressure cooker, which was really brilliant. Many critics say that her children have a bad appetite for a reason. Nobody wants to eat such dark food!
In addition to relying on dark cooking to boost her popularity, she also has a feature, that is, after a while, she will recall the glory of earning more than 10,000 yuan a month at work, and then sigh that she gave it up for the growth of her children, because she felt that "nothing is better than the happiness and health of children", and finally she did not forget to sublimate "sometimes she is confused and insecure without economic income".
Some people praised her in the comments at the beginning. When she talked about this topic repeatedly, someone began to remind her that "you are so entangled, you might as well go out to earn money and ask someone to take care of your children." "This negative emotion is not good for your child. Since you have chosen a full-time mother, don't always think about going out to earn money. "
Until recently, when she mentioned this topic again, it has become hundreds of thousands a year, so there is more irony.
If you can earn so much money, why live like this? Since working can earn hundreds of thousands of dollars a year, why not hire a better aunt? It's better for a professional to take care of children than to eat your black food every day!
Slowly, you can see, isn't this her traffic password? The more I look at it, the more I want to scold it. The more people go to see if she is posing or real, the traffic will come!
Another housewife video was recently pushed to me by big data every day. That girl is more unique. She is only in her twenties and already has a son and a daughter. Recent videos all say that she is pregnant with three children every day.
Originally, it was nothing. The country is open to childbearing, and it is your own business to have a few children. But in the video, she said today that "my husband didn't come home all night, and I'm used to living without him, so I'll stick to it for my children", and tomorrow she said "I don't need him now, as long as my children grow up healthily"? ……
Everyone can't calm down when they smell the resentment of living alone and being widowed.
Many people commented, what does such a man want? If two people come to this, it is better to divorce. Is it really just for his living expenses?
An experienced person also reminded that your resentment is very bad for children, and children can feel your unhappiness. Why complain and keep putting up with it?
The point is, everyone can see that you talk about your children every day, but you haven't seen how patient and troublesome you are with your children! Every day, I feel that laughing with my children is simply sending away three meals a day. Bitter mother can't stand it!
Everyone here is heartbroken for her, but her style has changed again. The copy has become "The Plain Life of a Family of Four", saying that the third child is what she wants, and her husband has never forced herself. She is also very willing to pay for this family. ...
It means, leave it alone, I'll take care of my stomach, you onlookers calm down!
There are even more chaotic things, such as "the life of a housewife begins at midnight". Looking at the title, it smells like a "good wife", and the content is basically the same, all of which are "recording" the busy night after her family went to sleep.
For example, from 10: 30, after my family had a rest, I began to clean up the messy dining table, wash dishes, wipe the table, pick up the toys that the children threw everywhere, and pick up my husband's socks and clothes. ...
The floor must be cleaned more than twice, the tables and chairs must be placed neatly, and even every corner of the stove should be polished.
This kind of busyness arrived at one o'clock in the morning, and then the housewife took a bath and changed clothes with satisfaction, put on a mask and told everyone that her whole day's work was over. Good night.
This is the late-night type, and there is another early-morning type.
Usually I get up after four o'clock and five o'clock in the morning, and then I start frying. I make a feast for more than a dozen people, and usually I will continue to clean up after everyone has left. I don't know. I thought it was the nanny's work record.
After brushing for a while, I found that these housewives are desperately trying to establish a "good wife and mother", but netizens generally don't buy it. In the past, they could get a lot of praise for sending this "get up at five in the morning to make breakfast", but now they can only get a lot of swearing and spitting.
Is "A Good Wife and Mother" suddenly out of fragrance?
Not necessarily. It's just that times have changed, so has everyone's lifestyle. With the improvement of women's status, the whole social pattern has also opened up.
Although "going to the hall and going to the kitchen" is still the universal standard for women, it is obvious that most people have a more rational and sober understanding of "what is a good wife and mother".
Among them, women's positioning of themselves is particularly prominent.
Most of the comments on these videos are from women, and many of them are mothers. There are two main reasons why they don't recognize these "good wives and good mothers":
First of all, it is very important to manage time well. Instead of getting up early in the morning and cooking a bunch of nutritious dishes, the neighbors are annoyed and hard. It's best to get all the food ready the night before and reheat it the next day.
I really can't get up. It is ok to buy some bread and milk outside. If the food in kindergarten or school is good, let the children eat there. There is absolutely no need to eat three meals a day.
Others say, why can't men help? Why is it a woman's duty to eat three meals a day?
Second, the contents of these videos are basically inseparable from "children, husbands and families", and many people can't stand it: you are so energetic, can't you spend some time on yourself when you get up at five o'clock every day? Isn't it just going to work to earn money, reading and studying by yourself after taking the children, or signing up for an interest class? Isn't it delicious?
Nowadays, women think very clearly that investing in themselves is better than investing in anyone. Although it is important to take care of children and family members, women still need to add value to themselves instead of running around others every day.
This is not a "roll" or a "bar".
Seriously, I prefer to believe that these videos are staged by a team, because if this is the real life of these housewives, it will be too humiliating, depressing, humble and full of resentment for full-time housewives. Seeing them, I think "housewife" is a derogatory term.
But at least around me, many housewives, even full-time mothers with no income at all, are not like this!
If there is a team behind these videos, if these teams still think that they can win women's recognition and praise with "mother-loving" PUA or selling anxiety, it can only be said that the members of their team may all be men with outdated concepts.
When more people talk about "time management", "self-improvement" and "life planning", when women begin to consciously resist this PUA, they are not so easy to fool!
They all know what a woman should pay for her family, what she gets, and where the value of life lies. The aura of "greatness" and "selflessness" is just a rope to extract the surplus value of women from it.
Beauvoir's "The Second Sex" said that people locked women in the kitchen or boudoir, but were surprised at her limited vision; People broke her wings, but lamented that she could not fly. I hope people will open her future, and she will never be forced to stay in the present again.
When women begin to appear in the vast space, the kitchen stove, family, workplace and even the whole world can no longer imprison their bodies and minds. After seeing Xinghai, they will no longer be willing to be kidnapped by narrow definitions and morality.
I hope that one day, a woman can love with her strength, not her weakness. Not to escape from yourself, but to find yourself, not to give up on yourself, but to affirm yourself.
Interestingly, big data seems to have guessed my mind again, and recently began to push me some videos of "male husbands".
In the video, men either get up at six o'clock in the morning, put on aprons and start to prepare breakfast for their wives and children, or fry stew and prepare a sumptuous dinner for the guests within an hour. Others secretly washed off the dirty clothes the night before in order to let their wives sleep more. ...
The comment area was full of praise, and I silently collected it and forwarded it to my husband. After a while, I received his contemptuous expression. Then, he added: What do you want to eat at the weekend? Let me make it for you!
I chuckled to myself. It is said that most of them show women's desire: when women wipe the dirty things off their faces and liberate themselves from the kitchen stove, it's your turn, men!