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Why do women always think too much? Psychologist dispels the myth that women are fragile and sensitive.

Author \Seeing Counseling Center Jean Lin Counseling Psychologist

However, is it true that women are more "worried" and prone to worry?

Ms. Xiaojun, who is also a woman, has thought about it, and it's a good question. We need scientific research and reasonable explanations, because I don't agree that women are a fragile and sensitive group. Clinical Psychology Review (Clinical Psychology Review) in a study, the past two decades of psychologists to study fear and anxiety-related literature to find out, to do gender differences in the post hoc analysis of research: brave men and timid women? animals, such as snakes. However, in large-scale cross-cultural studies, it has been found that there is a great deal of variation in children's perceptions of what is dangerous and what is benign and not to be feared. That means that fear is likely to be culturally or environmentally induced.

For example, when a third-grade girl calmly picked up a cockroach as a toy, an adult shrieked, "Hey, hey! How can you play with this as a girl! Put it down! It's dirty! No!" So the girl learned from then on to be afraid of weird-looking animals and not to get dirty.

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The second part of the physiological response

In adult research, there is not much of a difference between men and women in terms of physiological response to stress or anxiety, pain, rapid heartbeat, and sweating on the surface of the skin, among other physiological measurements. But women are more willing than men to voice these uncomfortable feelings and receive positive feedback. This is probably a lesson we've all been taught from a very young age, and the following conversation should not be unfamiliar to you.

Daughter: "Huh? Dad, I fell down, it hurts! Dad: "Oh! Okay, let me see, don't cry, don't cry, dad help you rub the medicine." Son: Dad, I just played ball hurt hand, (crying face) pain! Dad: Thick! It's okay! A boy should not cry so much! You have to be brave!

So it's not that boys aren't more afraid of pain, it's that they know that if they speak out about their pain or their fears, not only will they not get help, but they'll probably get hit even harder. So it's not that boys are less afraid of pain, it's that they know that not only will they not get help, but they'll be hit even harder, so they're more and more reluctant to reveal their worries or fears, based on their self-preservation instincts!

The gender-role expectations part

Speaking of fear of worrying, the research on social phobia found that a higher percentage of men and women suffer from this psychological disorder. The answer is not necessarily related to gender, but rather to whether or not the individual is limited by gender role stereotypes and is unable to be comfortable being themselves.

That is, a man who is more feminine and introverted is likely to have a higher level of social fear of not being accepted by the public. Conversely, the more people who can have bi-sexual traits, sometimes brash and sometimes gentle, the less likely they are to be social phobics. Isn't this finding yet another confirmation that delays and fears are actually learned, and that it is the invisible tightrope of gender roles that limits us?

4. Worrying about the unknown / rumination

The study also found that women are more likely than men to worry about the unknown and the threats in their daily environment, such as the pneumonia epidemic, which is difficult to control and is indeed the subject of most worrying concerns for women. This may be because women are often a high-risk group for crises such as sexual assault and domestic violence, and these traumatic events often occur with the people closest to them in their lives.

These traumatic experiences deepen a woman's sense of powerlessness to protect herself, or even her lack of confidence in her problem-solving abilities. The solution is to strengthen women's problem-solving skills and self-efficacy, that is, somehow, to make the 'unknown' into the 'known', and women need to believe that they are capable in order to stop worrying about agitation.

Another thing to note is that women are more likely than men to be overly reflective in their "rumination".

In recent years, psychological research has increasingly emphasized this kind of rumination, which is highly correlated with a tendency to depression. That is, when a mom or wife is constantly worrying about "Am I doing enough? Is it right? Is it safe? Did I miss something? What can I do to avoid danger? I'm afraid I'm not being careful enough..." If this kind of thinking takes up most of your time, it may do more harm than good, turning into "worrying about the sky" and making you anxious all the time.

The right amount of time to let go and shout STOP, even if you can't control 100% of your worries about the unknown, it's great to be able to do 80% of it! The right amount of worry is often the key to avoiding problems from worsening, and this is where a woman's maternal instincts come into play.

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So, when you hear someone say, "You women just think too much, and you always worry about a lot of things. More importantly, women's anxiety and fear means that they are better able to express their emotions and seek help than men, which in turn makes women more resilient and able to recover more quickly from setbacks and stressful events. By the way, look at Germany's Chancellor Angela Merkel, who was praised by the world during the pneumonia outbreak, and our President Ying, who was ahead of her time, they are both great women! Worrying and fearing in moderation is OK, and men and women can be honest about their anxieties so that they can work together to meet the challenges of the unknown.

Seeing the Psychological Counseling Center is authorized to reproduce the original source Why are women always worried and afraid?