# Shall we talk # is my first column, telling you the story of young people in this city.
The inspiration for writing this article comes from Charles Munger.
1986, Munger gave a speech on how to live a miserable life at Harvard graduation ceremony.
Most graduation speakers will choose to describe "how to live a happy life", but he thinks about this problem from the opposite side and explains how a graduate can live a painful life from the opposite side according to his own personal experience.
The countryman said, "If I knew where I would die, I would never go there."
At the age of thirty, even Aunt Wang, who lives next door, said, Young man, your life is going downhill.
Before the age of 30, the world gave you countless possibilities of life, naive, brave, restless, easy to fall in love, and especially easy to be happy.
But now, you are more afraid of death, pay attention to health, stay up for two or three days, and you have gone out to see the world. When you come back, you still need the warm company of your family.
To tell the truth, I just arrived at the door of "30 years old". I don't know if Aunt Wang is right, so I just learned from Mr. Munger once. With my limited life experience, if I do the following four things, my body and mind will be very painful and my decline will not be far away.
First of all,
Never form the habit of reading.
Not to mention lifelong learning.
"If a person doesn't know what happened before he was born, he will be like an ignorant child in life."
Cicero's words have proved that stupid people who know nothing about history can't live a highly effective and mature life.
Of course, extending this sentence, we can see that it is difficult to walk long in life by relying on our own inherent knowledge.
Buffett is a learning machine. He spends half his waking hours reading books. He knows that the way to make Berkshire Hathaway make money in the past ten years may not work in the next ten years.
No matter how busy the host Dong Qing is at work, she always keeps reading for one hour before going to bed every day, which helps her to have fluent and confident expression on the stage.
Like many people, I used to have a bad habit. The more anxious I am in the workplace, the more I like to buy books, but after receiving them, I will put them on the bookshelf or desk, so I can't devote extra time and energy to patiently reading the whole book.
At the beginning of this year, I started the # 10,000-hour reading plan #. Wake up in the morning and do three things: turn on Bluetooth, pick up your mobile phone, click on the audio application to read, and listen to Steven Covey's The Third Choice, Gladwell's The Stranger Effect and Zhang Hongjie's The Front and Side of Zeng Guofan.
If I still feel dissatisfied after listening to it, I will buy a paper book to read. This will be the quietest moment of the day, and I feel full of energy. Time begins to become generous and rational, and it is not easy to fall into emotional pull.
Second,
Stop writing,
Live in the comfort zone as much as possible.
Recently, I saw a friend who had been inactive for a long time in a circle of friends write: "When I get old, I find that I don't want to change the world, but I want to create a new one. I found that I have no ideal, because all the ideals have become dreams. It's really hard to be a man. I don't understand myself the most. "
Suddenly I was stabbed.
People are born with a kind of inertia, like to stay in a comfortable and familiar environment, avoiding risks and uncontrollable, and "withering" will slowly spread and kill you.
At the beginning of last year, a toll station in Tangshan was banned and a group of workers were laid off. One of the sisters cried and said, "I am 36 years old today, and my youth has been handed over to the toll booth." I can't do anything now, and nobody likes us. I can't learn anything. "
I feel a sadness through the screen, not that her unemployment is sad, but that she lost the courage to face life when she was only 36 years old.
Instead of forcing a person out of the comfort zone, it would be more accurate to use the expression "expanding the comfort zone".
Comfort zones also need to adapt to changes. There are always new and interesting things happening, and your safety scope is constantly expanding. It's best to start with what you want to do but haven't done yet.
This year, I began to learn snowboarding.
I'm afraid of losing my balance standing on high. The more you are afraid, the more you can stimulate the feedback mechanism of the body in the face of difficulties and stimulate a person's willpower. Go straight downhill and push the slope along the back edge. At the beginning, every new move you make has a sense of accomplishment. When you fall, you get up quickly. Skiing and life are worth moving forward.
Another thing is that I applied for driving school. After a long ideological struggle, I probably still want to put a pair of elegant high heels in the car on rainy days, and then step on them to have dinner with the people I like after parking.
Third,
Stop believing in love,
Those are fairy tales that deceive adults.
It is a dangerous thing to enter into intimate relationship. When age and the pressure around them hit, some people began to give up something quickly, complain and then compromise.
After all, people should have some sense of resistance and romance, otherwise it will be too boring.
In Thirteen Invitations, Xu Zhiyuan asked Cai Guoqiang what made him, and he said it was "a little boy's legend". On September 25th this year, 20,000 white day fireworks, including a poem, a calligraphy and a drama, were set off along the Charande River in Konnek, France. Teacher Cai Guoqiang expressed her lonely, isolated, introspective, unyielding and optimistic life status after the epidemic through romantic fireworks. I didn't expect the live broadcast to be cloudy, but I still saw him happy like a little boy.
Someone in Weibo asked, "Talk about how the trough of life passed."
The most praised comments are-for example, loving a pure and beautiful person.
In the back seat of a taxi, in the winter evening breeze, eating face to face and whispering in my arms, spring is suddenly released.
The regret and cost brought by innocence and profligacy sincerity are enormous, but the people in it are always unaware of it.
Therefore, I began to learn to be considerate and considerate of human weaknesses. Many times, there is no such thing as "say goodbye". I use my initial heart to face the passengers who stop in the middle.
It doesn't matter how many excellent members of the opposite sex have chased you. It is most important for a respectable person to choose to stay with you all the time.
A sad fact is that banks only lend money to the rich, and true love will only come to those who don't lack love.
It's not sad at all, it's just the truth.
Fourth,
Please be a slave to emotions,
Trapped in a low magnetic field of anxiety, jealousy and pain.
When people interact with each other, life is not just full of happiness.
Men are fine. They are born to dislike entangled animals. Women are more easily troubled by emotions.
Age, figure, ultraviolet rays, and women who make your boyfriend move, these are not natural enemies of modern women.
Their biggest natural enemy is that they are entangled with their emotions all their lives.
Standing at 30, whether you are married, single or divorced, you can't really relax. Otherwise, if you look at the smart and excellent Gu Jia, why did you rob the school district, buy Hermes, mix wives' circles, and lie in the bathtub drinking and crying after her husband cheated?
Everyone is anxious, which is a collective unconscious panic in the social environment.
Faced with the ups and downs in life, some people say that I don't defeat it by confrontation, but absorb it peacefully and accept its less perfect side.
This year, I continue to look for outlets and ways to express my emotions.
Practice modern dance every Wednesday, stretching, retracting and muscle control. It is more like an emotional experience, listening to the body, letting go of self and manipulation, releasing ups and downs to achieve stability, and learning to cherish your feathers more.
Exercise, make a SPA with essential oil, rest regularly, meditate, visit an art exhibition at least once a month, dress up and go to a restaurant to eat delicious food, buy flowers at the flower market, spend the weekend in the mountains, and make some good friends seriously.
By the way, in the eyes of true friends, you will see your own value.
Age doesn't bind you, but the way you look at it.
After 30 years, the world still gives you many possibilities of life, naive, brave, restless, easy to fall in love and especially easy to be happy. Please keep the quality of these flashes.
If you are still 30 years old in the future, stay tuned. 30 years old, rich, thoughtful, mature and charming, so cool!
I am glad that after a long period of adjustment, I have regained my desire to express, tell stories and express my feelings. I sincerely hope to get your response and complete my connection with the world again.
"Movies, like life, are determined by the aftertaste." I think what Yasujirō Ozu said is right.
What did you say?/Sorry?